Danny

?WHY?
2005-02-21 14:44:00 (UTC)

Do unto others....

Whats up with that phrase?
Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.
Heck, is it really that simple...or..complex?

Wasn't it passed down to us from a higher being in order
for humanity to live in a community with no hate or
violence? Probably. But, when you really think about it,
that little phrase is true to everyone, and not only in the
most common, most thought of way. I mean, of course, the
phrase indirectly means don't do this and don't do that.
Don't kill, don't murder, don't lie, don't cheat, don't
steal...don't do any of this to others if you don't want
others to do any of this to you. Right?

Fine. But what about those things that you DO want others
to do to you? What about those words or actions intended
towards others are to give them a hint that you would like
it recipricated? No, not the violence and hurtful words,
the nice gestures and encouraging/comforting words. Ever
think of it that way? Perfect example, if a husband turns
to his wife and says "I Love You", what should the wifes
response be? Obviously the same (with a little "too" at
the end.) Why? Because it gives comfort to the husband
knowing that the wife is in love with him...(of course she
is, she IS his wife. But sometimes, these little reminders
makes us feel better...make us feel wanted...gives us the
attention, although small attention, that we strive for.)

Humans need attention, some more than others. Why else do
we socialize? And, to be honest, a little attention at the
right time can make or break the day (or night). They say
that girls are the mushy type, always wanting little gifts
and poems and romantic dinners and sweet gestures....but
why. No, its not because they are materialistic (not
entirelly), but its because they enjoy the attention they
receive. Males are like this too (just not in the "mushy"
way) Why else do females dress the way they do at clubs or
bars (males too)?

Ask yourself though...what kind of attention do they want
to attract? What about the image along with that attention?

Why do you care for your friends? Because you expect the
care to be returned. Of course, you'd probably say that
its from the goodness of your heart, and it probably is.
But when you need a little help from that friend and they
can't give it to you because they are "busy", are you
saying that the though of "well, i helped you, so you
should help me" doesn't even slightly cross your mind?
And perhaps the reason why we do help people is because
that is the way we get the attention we strive for.

Now, this attention can be anything. A look, a wink.
Blowing a kiss. A "slide" of the hand across the small of
the back. What about a drink or treat? You show up at work
to find a little "surprise" on your desk or locker. It
could be from anyone, not necessarily from that one
someone, but still "its the thought that counts". Making
someone realize that they are cherished is a great ability,
and many people do not realize how easy it is. Words
especially. A simple word can make the difference.
Which would you like to have said to you as you go off to
work:
"Have a good day, call me when you get the chance."
OR
"Have a good day sweety, call me when you get the chance."

That one word. Whether its from a parent, or "significant
other", it gives a sense of personlization; a sense of
attention; a sense of belonging. Even though you know that
that person cares about you, that little word strengthens
that knowing, fortifies the feeling inside of you.

Now, of course, words must be chosen wisely. Depending on
the person, you must use a certain word instead of another.
Calling your friend sweety doesn't seem right (to me
anyways). But, someone who is more than a
friend...girl/boy friend, fiancee, wife/husband, soul
mate...sweety would work. Right?

Think of a gang. A typical movie-like gang. Big tough guys
walking around with baggy clothes in a big group. Pretty
menacing, right. Then why do they say "bro" or "dog"
or "buddy" to each other?
"Yo bro, whats happening?" -high five is given.
Why? A sense of belonging; a sense of attention.
Maybe that is why kids join gangs; these little words (and
actions like the high five) that are "common" now actually
gives them the sense of attention that they don't otherwise
receive at home, or school, or anywhere else.

Of course, depending on who the person is, words, and
actions, must be chosen wisely. Flirting....where did that
come from. Also, why do we write such blogs on the web?
Really, for yourself? I dont think so, not entirely
anyways, even though you may think so differently. All I
know is that I write in order to be read. Or else, I
wouldn't write at all. Because, who else would read
it...me...I already know what its about.

So, what now? Nothing. Just go on with your life. Simple.
But, to those who would like it...a kiss on the cheek is
what I send to you (or a hug, depending on what you like).

Acknowledgement. A small word, with a powerful effect.

XXOO




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