shopaholikk007

everyday thoughts
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2005-02-19 00:16:58 (UTC)

not fair!!!

hey! its me, feeling bad again. i no it may seem like im
always feeling like that but truth is that i just write
when im feeling bad. and rite now im sooo mad bc its not
fair that kealey gets to do whatever she wants on her b-day
bc her parents love her sooo much n they actually show it.
not just say it. i dont even want to remember what happened
on my b-day, bc it sucked ass. But i guess she deserves it,
i mean yea, she does. But then again i did too, i guess
everyone isnt as lucky as some pple. it isnt fair!! my
parents old me that its bc of
the situation we're going through but it was my b-day n now
of course everyone can do something for kealeys b-day n
everyone cares sooo much, but my b-day sucked soo bad! i
just have to get this out. and im not jealous bc she
deserves it sooo much but i did too. i hope im like the one
having the greatest b-day at the end bc i know that
everything happens for a reason but its just hard to look
at it that way sometimes, you no? her mom treated her like
royalty on her b-day n mine just didnt n ya i no its sad n
pathetic but that is how it went. i sooo hope next year (if
im alive by then) its better. much better. my parents said
that they were still gonna celebrate my b-day the way its
supposed to be when they get back on track n on the money,
but rite now they cant. n it sucks!!! its not fair, like
ive said 832795 times. n its so
hard to just keep a straight face n help ur other friends w-
their problems when ur feeling worse than them. but as a
friend i have to n its soooo stressing, u have noo idea. im
no psychiatrist! wtf? but i do want to be one tho. i
think im pretty good at it. haha. humor its coming back...i
hope God remembers this n makes it all better at the end n
shows me that this happen bc of sum important reason.

i love them but she made me have the most horrible bday in
the world n i gave her the best of me on her bday n i made
her feel like royalty so i think i should be rewarded bc of
that. i mean im sooo nice to have done that when she didnt
deserve that from me. she didnt even say happy bday to me.
i didnt take like revenge or whatever, u no what i mean?
well, i love her to death but i just will never forget what
she did for my bday n how bad i cried! neway, i think i
failed english! holy poop, how do u explain that to ur
parents? neway, my teacher is stupid bc she didnt even tell
me i was failing???wtf? @ least tell the girl. so im not
taking any responsibility for that bc if i wouldve known i
were failing i wouldve pulled that grade up, big time! im
not even bad @ english it just caught me so off guard.
speaking of guard i just got a mouth guard for rugby! ya,
im playing rugby!haha, its fun too! rly fun. tomorrow is my
first game. not technicalyy, but sorta, kinda, in a way.
its a scrimage or however you spell it. well loves, ive
gots to go! l8r


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