Eugene

Date With Destiny
2005-02-17 20:13:56 (UTC)

Repetition

Repetition
From MutinyFever on 2/17/2005 2:45:34 PM

Repetition
From MutinyFever on 2/17/2005 3:58:53 AM
Quitting smoking is about going through the same maneuvers
over and over and over again. Craving, post, support,
distraction, relief, craving, post, support, distraction,
relief, craving, post, support, distraction, relief,
craving...

As I look over the writing I've done during this quit, I
see a very small number of actual topics. I've written
about craving, about the myth of just one, about relapse,
about rationalizations, about bogus products, and about the
relationships in my life. I've written about pain and
desire. I'm clever enough to write all that stuff down
once, understand it, and you'd think, be done with it, but
I've written the same stuff over and over and over.

I would have thought that strange in the beginning, but I
understand it now. The addiction has formed patterns in my
mind, and my thoughts run in those patterns. To quit, I
have had to add side trips to those patterns, and each time
I want a cigarette, I have to go on a new, well travelled
diversionary path.

So, I'm sorry if you've heard it all before.

Michael
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