maesy

The end has no end
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2005-02-15 12:14:24 (UTC)

i'm the only one crying

today was alright, school was a bludge, as per bloody usual (mum swears that
ruby an i spend more time at the coffee shop, roys, than we do in class). i did
a spot of work then proceeded to waste about half the day swilling skim
lattes... we came home, and wasted a few hours flicking through trashy
magazines.
honestly i'm in year twelve, the tough gig, the hsc year, the "i'm really gonna
work" stuff yet i've managed to treat school as a resort and get away with it,
teachers love me, the marks are great ( a bit of hyperbole there). i guess i'm
in for a nasty suprise come november.
anyway so mum and step father are at some concert for the guy from the
small faces... i, alone pottering about, traversing the wide web, come across
the rspca website and proceed to look at all the 'adopt me' cats. they were so
gorgeous and hopeful looking i burst into tears and went into fully fledged
racking sobs on my bed, clutching a pillow. this is not normal behaviour --
yet it was so sad i just want to take each of them into my life and spend the
rest of my days being an old mad cat lady. i'd have to work on the old part,
but i've got a few dresses in the back of my wardrobe (halfway between the
colony of mothballs and narnia) that could work towards adding several years
to my countenence.
so i'm all tired out now, post pms bleeding heart fit. i think it also had a lot to
do with the death of my beautiful bill. its a month today since i got that
phone call.
tomorrow i'm seeing dad. elise has fallen in love with nicola, who isn't even a
lesbian but is outrageously flirting ... holding hands and shit.. ugh, this really
confirms my heterosexuality, it seems that everyone thinks its okay to toy
with lesbians and 'experiment' as if they are just sex objects you can dump
when you discover again how much you like boys... sigh. i hate everyone.


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