mr darcy's opinion
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2005-02-13 17:29:26 (UTC)

post birthday

the weekends are really good..i did work alst nite not
bad...i tried to hide all my feelings of
disapointment..and my remorse hatred abt myself... when
malen told me that ben makes her feel so complete and whe
shes around him...hes really a bf...fuck fuck.. i dnt
knw..if im jealous of the fact that she found love and i
didnt and i cant... is this..wrong? this
selfishness... i pretend a lot in front of her...that i
have found love..i made it all up...but louise used to be
real..but shes too complicated.. i tried to keep her..
anyways.. went to church...for refuge..i feel all my
burden was jst counting for the days...i
go..back home..and really relax...i hate myself...right
now...i hate ben..bec hes more goodlooking than me...i
hate that he has malens attention...and everybdy is
talking abt jst jealous...fuck

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