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illuminations
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Ezoic
2005-02-04 07:54:49 (UTC)

being me, the real me

Today i hung out with Tizzy, we didnt drink, or go out or
do anything special(besides getting jezebel-my new puppy :-
D ) but it was actually a lot of fun and i really enjoyed
it...
So i picked her up and we went to see this puppy that i
was thinking about buying, and DID ^-^ !!! then we went
to dara's for about an hour to see her baby, of course i
had to show off my little baby too!! (she's a cute litte
beanie baby sized miniature pincher) we hung out there for
a while, and chatted with dara and her mom, lol and dara's
mom and i laughed about old times when we caused trouble
and made her and my parent worry... a little weird, but it
was funny... then we came back to my house and played with
jezebel (my min pin) she kept attacking tizzy's foot
lol... then we went over to my dorm, hung out, got bored
lol, and came back to my house. we were going to rent
napoleon dynamite(sp?) but decided to just hang out, then
nat called and said we should stop by her house with
jezzy, so we went over there. we hung out over there for
about an hour just talking and joking... it was really fun
though just hangin out with the girlies having a good
time, not needing to drink or go out to make it fun, i
think thats what i miss most about the time before mike,
just hanging out with girl doing silly girlie things
(talking about boyfriends, joking around with each other,
doing each others hair, talking about dumb stuff that
makes us laugh) i really really miss all of that...
so anyway after that i drove tizz home and it was a night.
No i didnt drink or even go out to a bar or club, and it
didnt seem like we did all that much, although it did take
up the whole day, but still i liked it, i liked more than
i have liked just hanging out in a long time. i'm sick of
hanging out with people, where i feel like we need to do
something to have fun. i liked just kickin back and having
a good time. it makes me remember the old days, with
bridget, colleen, and emily... just hanging out having
good fun... makes me kinda sad in a way.. that i've wasted
so much time worrying about when i will go out next and
what i will do and what will happen, and will i have fun
or not, when i could have been spending it bonding with
friends and being the real me, the fun, goofy, silly yet
serious, caring, me.
i have a lot of excitement about my life right now and the
direction its starting to take. i know i am no long at a
standstill, or even stepping backwards on my path, i'm
moving forward and liking. i am determined and confident
in getting a job, doing the best i can at school, being
the best friend i can be, and the best girlfriend i can
be. i don’t need to go out drinking to enjoy life and
satisfy my cravings, which is a lesson i needed to learn,
and did. all i need to do, is be the real me, embrace the
real me, share the real, and love the real me, and have
fun for cryin out loud! The good, wholesome, kinda fun.
and also just live life as it comes, and be the best
person I can be.
That’s all ^-^


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