My Life
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2005-02-04 01:20:42 (UTC)

another fight with Isaac

Dear Diary,
I am Amber Lawrence and My boyfriends name is Isaac
Mayes. He moved away on our 6th month aniversery of going
out. We have almost been going out for a year. But I don't
know if we are going to last that long. I thought we would
be together for ever but the fighting has began. I asked
him what he thinks about and he wouldn't tell me. So I
kept bugging him and he still wouldn't tell me. He said
that I am stressing him out and signed off instant
messanger. He had me in tears because yet again I had
started the fight and I felt really bad. I just wanted to
know if he thinks about me as much as I think about him.
After that fight I don't know if we are still going out or
if that was the sign that says it is over. I really love
him but I am really stressed out because of school and
weird guys. My boyfriend just doesn't understand how hard
it is getting for me. I just turned 13 and it is all ready
awful. I don't want it to be so awful. I just want to go
back to being 12 and getting in trouble for talking with
Isaac in class. I miss the fun dates we went on. Now I am
only seeing him for 3 days every 3 monthes. I am trying to
hold on to what we had before August but it is slipping.
And as that slips so does what I have been for the past 11
monthes. I miss Isaac and I love him but he needs to take
a big step back and let me get thru this time. And it
might help if he tries treating me with more trust. I
trust him and I was going to change this diary to Public
so he could read it. Maybe then he will understand me
better. It would be good for him.