Lala's Log
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2005-01-30 17:23:34 (UTC)

What a weekend!

Well I left Saturday night to go visit Jay's (the girl I'm
casual dating--very casual) friend in another city. We had
to get change together to get our buts up there and then
they gave us three bucks to get back. Two jobs and I'm
still poor as [email protected]#$! Anyways I really could have taken my
truck but I need that gas to get me to work for the rest
of the week and sorry there is no way I'm putting my job
in jeapordy for a weekend! So anyways I went up there and
I forgot to put Hunnie away in her cage!! Huge mistake I
came home to Abby's teddy from Olga unstuffed and denosed.
Oh she is going to kill me!!!!!!!!! Its a good thing I
asked Davy to check on Hunnie. I never forget to put her
in her cage I was just rushing out. I hate gettting yelled
out! Anyway the weeked was fun. I ate her friends dinner
had small talk with her friends husband (husbands always
find me interseting like they would a big hairy spider.
Then kind of poke questions at me and see how I react.)
Anyway Jay and I cuddled and cuddled and cuddled...she has
never been with what I would consider a lesbian but with
girls that are in transition from straight to gay because
they wouldn't go down on her or cuddle. So I let her feel
free to cuddle and later we had sex which wasn't bad. Its
kind of hard with her because her arm gets tired when she
fingers me and she wants me to get off really fast. Okay I
am not a microwave, I'm an oven I need some pre-heating.
She should understand that it take her longer than anyone
else I have slept with and I work throw it. I mean its all
lower...higher...f#$$ me...okay stop I'm sore...okay rub
me...oh that feels good...don't
stop...lower...higher...etc. It just goes in a horrible
cycle that never gets her off. I just want to say hush
because I can feel when shes getting close and she always
has me do something different it ticks me off. She has ADD
and shes bi-polar so she has a hard time focusing because
the meds shes on. But I had a good time and it was nice
being out on Indy. I held her hand...kissed her in a video
store. I kind of felt like she was my girlfriend and then
on the way home it hit me hard. I don't love her and
sometimes I don't even like her as bad as that sounds its
just that I love having a girlfriend. (Little side note my
mom said the work "girlfriend" my mom has taken this gay
thing so well I really think she knew all along. LOL) I
love having someone make my heart flutter...someone to
call and think of every moment. So I talked with her and
said she had to understand that I was in no place to have
her as my girlfriend and that she needs to focus on her
and that we can see each other twice a month but that
would probably be that. I could break this girls heart so
easily. I have never broken anyones heart and I don't want
to start now. I am so freakin sick...this could is just
not stopping. I've had a runny nose for like three weeks
now. I wanted to get so much done by know and I so much
cleaning to do and the only things I've done is pick up a
little of my apartment and got laundry started at my
mom's. I need to get a lot done before Abby gets home. I
want to convert Chris's room so its all Abby's stuff. Davy
and his girlfriend where hinting that they wanted to move
in with us. Abby and Davy had been avoiding each other so
I don't really understand but if they moved in rent would
be so much cheaper and Abby and I could save more but I
don't see that happening. Anyways everything is up in air
and I better go check on my laundry...

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