poeticgem

My sometimes coherent thoughts
2005-01-29 06:26:44 (UTC)

Tired ... so very tired

emotionally, mentally and physically ...

it was sadder and so much harder than I expected seeing
Harry and saying good bye to him ... and it seemed to be
twice as hard for him since he was giving me Sam ... so
both his dog and girlfriend (ex or otherwise) are going
away ... and not just AWAY .... but rather far away ...

I pray that distance doesn't diminish the connection we've
shared all these years ...

well, Joaquin called and he won't be able to come take the
sofa or the fridge because he can't get anyone to help
him ... so I guess it all stays here (at least he
called) ... God I don't want to cry ... really I don't ...
but it's hard leaving so much behind ... so much of my
life ... in the garbage, left behind ... trashed ...

and Chantelle is so upset ... I'm bearing the weight of her
sadness and mine because if it weren't for me she wouldn't
be suffering ...

I want to stay focused on the positive ... but for now the
only positive is that we don't have to go to a homeless
shelter and I guess that in itself is something to be very
grateful for ... so I will stay in this moment and
thankful ...




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