This One Is Mine!
2005-01-27 21:50:44 (UTC)

Loosing it!

Ok you guys... I know its been a while, just trying to
find myself lately... find happiness, but I think that is
one thing that will always remain in the dark for me.
I dont mean to sound all depressed and shit, Im just
having a tough time lately... some of you will see why if
you end up reading my previous entries.
I do have some good news... I have a "guy-friend". He is
so darn cute... has the mohawk going on and everything.
Hes really sweet, which I guess is something I have been
waiting for... but I dont want to get too close and set
myself up for something bad.
Im seriously considering dropping out of school... my
teachers give me hell. I get really good grades now and
everything, I have only had 10 referals throughout the
year so far... but yet Im still the bad girl.... still the
junkie/ hard-ass. And I dont want to be that anymore, I
just want to go and get my work done and get the hell
out... but they wont let it happen. For some reason they
think that every word that comes out of my mouth is fuck
or bitch. No matter what I do I am never the good one who
does all her work, Im always the troubled one who
struggles... even though I get A's and B's, so what the
fuck? What the hell am I doing wrong?
Anyways... I guess I should get going now... Im really
bored and I think Im gonna go take a shower.
"Imagine a king..(president)... who could fight his
own battles."

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