rachel

beautifuly broken
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2005-01-24 00:38:25 (UTC)

"him".....again

tonight he looked at me the way he used to when we were
together. he even kissed me on the neck. i love him so but i dont
think he knows. i love him but at the same time i hate him. he broke
my heart more than once but yet the last time was my fault i should
have never done n e thing with his friend! i miss him so much
though. i really messed up badly! i wish i could go back about 2
months ago so i could just say NO uh how could i have been so
stupid. but he knows the truth about iskill how can he be still mad
at me? he was someone who told me he cared and he really didnt
show it. the reason why he is in jail right now is because he is a
abuser. i am the reason why he is in jail. he abused me and i have
the brusies and marks to prove it to him. i loved him but his love
was artifically sweet. he was so nice at first but he turned out to be
an asshole! gosh i wish i could take everything back! i wish i never
even met him! "him" is the only one who i accually trust to take care
of me right. i love him so much, but he hates me now. well thats all
for now...xoxox you know you love me luv rae


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