Danny

?WHY?
2005-01-23 18:27:38 (UTC)

It must be me...

Went to a club last night. Yup. Thats right. A club. A
loud, dark, smelly club with people going in all sorts of
directions in an environment so diorientating that it took
an extra effort to steady my $6.50 cup of ice with a drop of
who knows what as people shuffled bumped and butted past.
BUT, as you will remember from a previous post, it was a
desicion I made and an experience I won't forget.

No offence to those whose night it was for, but the most
enjoyable part of the night was the drive to the club. A
friend of mine came with me as I drove...while everyone else
took a cab because they intended on drinking. (Apparently it
is considered "cool" to drink to the point that you can't
even handle youself after). Anyways, during the drive down,
the two of us did what any other people would have
done...talked and get caught up of each others lives. She
told me stories, and I the same. At one point we had a good
laugh because of the wrong turn I had taken and the
temporary "Where the heck are we" thoughts imerged.

Once at the club, we waited outside in line to get in. It
wasn't long though, probably due to the -30 with windchill
tempurature. Checked our coats, got frisked down of any
weapons (although I still had my keys on me, and they were
pretty dangerous) and proceeded for an "night out". I met
up with a bunch of other friends I haven't seen in awhile,
but all I could say to them was Hey or whats up, or at least
I think that is what I said... I couldn't even hear myself
speak. We waited for the rest of the party to arrive, and
then got some drinks. And proceeded to a dance area. From
then on, I drifted between sticking with one group or
another group, since the large group of us began to break
down and venture off into the other rooms of music. This
process continued for practically the entire night, with the
only act common in all of them was that once at whatever
destination, we began to "boogie" to whatever style of music
playing. I remember one room we walked into, and out of
very VERY quickly. Not sure of the music type, but lets
just say that everyone in the small, cramped, and humid room
chanted along with the music with the odd wave of their hand
in the air in a gun like fashion, constantly jumping,
literally jumping up and down in one spot.

This scared me, because I have actually witnissed what
society, or at least parts of it, have succumbed to. My
friend who I was with said that was disgusting and wrong. I
honestly wanted to start killing them, it was just horrid.
I did have my keys, I could have started in the back,
jabbing the largest of keys into the spine between the 3rd
and 4th vertebrate (if I am correct) instantly paralyzing
the victim, and offering them a slow and painful death as
their main nervous system completly severs. (I read about
this in a book...Tom Clancy. I don't have a good memory,
can't really remember main chracters in books, let alone the
plot or storyline. But I do remember, in all the books I've
read, how to kill someone..in many different ways...on not
leave a trace. Now isn't that scary? Its also another story)

There were many times when I would just look out onto the
dance floor and see the hordes of people moving in a wave
like fashion, both up and down and side to side. I even
focused on severl individuals to see how they displayed
their entusiasm for a place such as this. Everyone had a
style, everyone had a look. But there was one thing that
was indifferent about their movements...and that was
repitition. I personally can't stand repitition, I enjoy
doing things differently. (Whether it is skating and
stickhandling a puck with one hand on the stick during a
drill (in which case you'd need both hands) or attempting a
double bank shot to hit the most impossible shot in pool
instead of the most easiest shot available...one that
everyone else in a 25km radius would have taken.) Don't get
me wrong, dancing is an art. But I believe it is an art in
which two people should perform together along a simliar
course...to steady music. (But even then isn't it
repititious.....? ) I have thought of this many times, how
I have wished I had, or could, dance with a person in my
arms. And there are times when I couldn't, or didn't, and
have regretted it.

One thing that struck me last night, though, was what the
whole club-like atmosphere brought out in people..well,
actually individuals. Firstly, there physical appearance
and attire. I couldn't believe the "out fits" or lack there
of that were worn...or was it the out fit wearing the
person? And unforunately it was mostly females, the gender
that has been and will continue to fight for equality. I
gues I am thankful that is was no one I knew, but it still
bothered me. There were several girls, employed by the
club, to dress in a night-attire red "dress" I guess, and
sit or lay on a rasied platform covered in cotton to promote
strawberries I believe. And I watched as guy after guy
walked up to them and talked to them, the odd smile or laugh
resulting. I thought that was disrespectful for both that
person, and those around. To display yourself as
"eye-candy" and nothing more, to me, gives the impression of
a lack of dignity, self respect, and values in that person,
and who they represent.

They say beauty is in the eye of the beholder, whatever that
means. But it must be me, because I remember falling in
love with a female who, on first encounter, was wearing
dirty track pants, an old t-shirt, and a faded base ball
like shirt over top, with her hair down and in a mess. But
no more on this topic.

On the way home from the club, with the same person as I had
been with on the way to the club, we began talking. She
didn't enjoy the experience either, because like me,
clubbing wasn't her "thing". But we both went in respect
for a friend. I told her my thoughts, similar to what I have
written here, and she agreed. She said, not exact, but
something along the lines of:

There are a few people left in the world who not only live
by their morals, values, dignity, and self respect, but dare
not to venture away from them. Many people how have
values...and the rest...slowly loose them in order to be
accepted into the society that we have become. (She and I
have both witnissed this through old friends). Its like we,
(the two of us) are among those few people who follow their
values and the rest to the T, and in the end, because we are
not like the majority, because we are not like everyone
else, because we don't lower our standards as an individual
to those of others who barely have any....we are the ones
who end up getting screwed in the end.

The whole club-experience wasn't a good one, but it wasn't a
bad one either. It wasn't the first one, and probably won't
be the last. People are scared individually, but in a group
they are safe...or believe they are anyways. This is why I
think people go to clubs...to act in a manner that would
otherwise be in-appropriate at home, school, work, or
anywhere else. They go to "let loose" whatever has held
them back, to "vent" and "be with friends" (how are you with
them if you can't even say hi to them without loosing your
voice?) People like people, they don't like to be alone.
People like to socialize, yet many do not know how to. This
is why they go to clubs, I believe. Once in a while is fine,
I guess, until you grow out of it...I personally never grew
into it. People go there to act in ways out of the norm, to
drown out the world in drinks and loud music, to disorient
themselves from reality, yet if they were approached on
their individual actions that night, they would simply deny
it, or say, it was the drinks or the loud music. Or, it was
all in good fun with friends. If that is the case, then I
accept it. But I ask you these two simple
questions....Firstly, Is it more fun to go to a club than it
is to go out to dinner with the same people, or even go,
lets say, bowling? I don't think so. Because, in the club,
you are with people, but then again, you are alone. You can
hardly communicate and socialize, and instinct that is
imbedded into our genes as a method of survival.

Secondly, and my final thought. If the club is so fun, and
so social, and a place to do whatever and not (italicize
not) feel ashamed...then why is it so dark? Can anyone say,
masquerade.....




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