onlyme29

Sir, this is for you
2005-01-15 02:55:09 (UTC)

but i AM happy!

i'm happy! really! tralalalala!! oh so happy!! yay look at
me being happy!!
so don't worry. don't be so serious all the time. it's ok.
life's about chaos. spontaneity. intuitions. messes.
disorder. that's what it's about. just lay back, enjoy
whatever it thows at you. you may think this is very
positive of me, but it's not. it's not positive or
negative. just life. it's there. it's real. it's fresh.
it's alive.
think of eve taking her first bite of the forbidden fruit.
imagine how bright the world must have become! i can just
taste the sweetness of the apple, the clarity that it
induced... can't you? it's there. and then she must have
taken a second bite for who could resist such lush fruit?
this bite was probably different from the first bite. the
first was so eager. she just dug into it. but the second
must have been more profound. slower. really looking at
everything around her. and that's when she realized that
the world was not perfect, like she thought. but you know
what? if she could have done it all over again, she still
would have partook of the forbidden apple. because she was
curious. she wanted knowledge. she didn't want everything
to be perfect. she was tired of living in a perfect world
with a perfect mate and everything she could ever want.
even though she had terribly trying experiences, they all
became part of her. they were like battle scars of a war
still being fought. but she loved it. she loved her
independence, her freedom. and that's why she never found
herself longing for that perfect world.




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