Growing From Pain

It is Absolutely Amazing
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2005-01-13 05:05:19 (UTC)

The First Time

Ryan and I had been messing around for about a week maybe a little longer.
It was Labor Day weekend, and we’d both decided to stay in the dorms
instead of going home. Elizabeth, my roommate and his ex-girlfriend, was
going to go home and visit her parents. I had asked Elizabeth if it was okay if
I liked Ryan. She had broken up with him over 6 months earlier and was
dating someone else. She said that it was fine. I spent the night with Ryan on
Saturday. We had messed around a few more times since the first time. He
knew I was a virgin. We watched Kill Bill volumes 1 and 2. That night we were
kissing and caressing and orally pleasuring one another when we began
grinding against one another. I stopped this action several times saying that I
shouldn’t or I can’t. After a few hours of this, I looked to him and I asked him
to be the one to say no (I won’t have sex with you). He replied by saying
something to the effect of well I’m certainly not going to do that because I
want to have sex with you. So I gave in. I enjoyed it, immediately afterward I
didn’t regret it. It wasn’t anything remotely resembling rape. It was two
people who wanted each other physically, and I just couldn’t resist the
temptation any more. He was so gentle and careful and kind. He was
incredible. It hurt some not too much, and he took great care to make sure I
was enjoying it and that I was in as little pain as possible. It was a wonderful
first experience. I already very much liked spending time with him and
wanted to date him, but I wanted to give him more time. I didn’t want to
pressure him. I would soon after fall in love with him. Unfortunately, I found
out later that this meant nothing to him. That yeah he enjoyed having sex
with me, just like he enjoyed having sex with Elizabeth and Cara. He was
having sex with all 3 of us over the period of a few months. For the first
month and a half I had no idea.


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