Bruce Wayne

2005-01-10 14:59:51 (UTC)

Unappreciated...pitty party

It was Steve's 40th B'day and Jan threw him a surprise
party in Ogunquit Sat Night. Well it was blizzard like
conditions out but we braved the elements. Jan had aske
John and Scott to roast Steve and I have to admit to
feeling somewhat slighted by the fact that she didn't ask

It took about 2.5 hrs to get there (normally takes about
1hr 15 mins to get there). The Restaurant was really nice
and Steve was stunned when he walked in the room and
everyone was there. It was a really nice showing and I
would have been very touched with the effort it took for
everyone to attend...and Steve definitely was.

During the meal Scott started talking about their
childhood and was fumbling for stories to share. I chirped
in about the Frosty the Snowman Karoke episode in Old
Orchard. John was the keynote speaker and just rambled on
and on. He was trying to use a theme of "More". Saying
that Steve always aspires to more, hard worker, good
friend sort of thing. Uninspired.

I told Rob that I'd felt somewhat slighted and she made a
good point that Jan got what she asked for by asking John
and Scott to handle things.

Afterward we went over to the Hotel where the Durans and
Scott and Lisa were staying and hung out in the lobby
watching Football and drinking. At some point Robyn looked
at me and was feeling sappy (I mean that in a good way).
It was nice to see her feelling that way about me. I don't
doubt that she feel that way about me but the expression
of it isn't as frequent as I'd like sometimes.

I think I'm just feeling sorry for myself, despite not
having many reasons to . I'l be starting a new job in a
few weeks and it's causing me some anxiety. It's with a
company that provides a service for my current company. I
think it's going to involve more travel than I'd like but
I'll give it a shot. I feel badly leaving my current
employer. They just had the Southeast Rep leave, the
Central US Rep is giving notice soon as well. Then
me...It's not going to go over well but I kind of feel
like I have to do it. I don't feel like the current gig is
totally secure and the committment of the company isn't
great. Growth has been slow, they aren't supporting us
with adtional products, and I still don't have a 401k
plan. They are going to hit my commission for 10% of
overdue balances now. The commission structure in the new
job isn't as good but the volume should make up for it.
It should be a 100K position but the accountability seems
a bit high. That's'll keep me honest. Their
travel restrictions are a little stiff on paper but it
sounds somewhat flexible in reality . They know my
concerns and have assured me that it's no problem. I've
been asking them about their 401K set up and if there is a
buyout if I don't elect to use their insurance
coverage...I still don't have an answer.

I don't have the best feeling about this new gig and I'm
not entirely sure why. The expectations are high and
that's a bit of a concern, but that'll motivate me both
financially and ego-wise. Some of it is Dave, he's a sales
guy thru and thru. I'm trying to take him at his word but
there is a voice in the back of my head telling be to be

I'm running out of steam on this entry. I don't really
have alot to be unhappy about, maybe it's just a bad day.
Let it be... this too shall pass