marie aka mississippi
Read it or DON'T.....bad dream.....
CheviSoSexxi (8:37:23 PM): u busy
LayDMiya160 (8:37:39 PM): naw just filling out job
LayDMiya160 (8:37:41 PM): why wassup
CheviSoSexxi (8:37:57 PM): nada...
LayDMiya160 (8:38:18 PM): what u doin
CheviSoSexxi (8:39:27 PM): nada...eatin' juss woke up!!
CheviSoSexxi (8:39:39 PM): i had a bad dream
LayDMiya160 (8:39:53 PM): about?????????
CheviSoSexxi (8:40:12 PM): my friend....that passed away
LayDMiya160 (8:40:43 PM): what happened in the dream
LayDMiya160 (8:40:52 PM): if u want to talk about it
CheviSoSexxi (8:41:15 PM): man...same thing sorta that
LayDMiya160 (8:41:54 PM): U cool?
CheviSoSexxi (8:42:03 PM): man naw...
CheviSoSexxi (8:42:07 PM): it was different
CheviSoSexxi (8:42:09 PM): cuz like...
LayDMiya160 (8:42:45 PM): cuz like what
LayDMiya160 (8:42:49 PM): talk to me ma
CheviSoSexxi (8:42:58 PM): i was juss chillen w/ him an
CheviSoSexxi (8:43:25 PM): i was drivin' an i seen the
accident....an i was on my way to prom (everyone was)
CheviSoSexxi (8:44:22 PM): an so i found out it was
him...i aint got to skoo.....lots of folkz came to my
hosue (friends) an it was like i aint believe it
CheviSoSexxi (8:45:23 PM): i wanted to go to skoo but i
juss couldnt if i went an i aint see him there...so i was
gettin' dressed for the funeral (eveyone wore pink) so im
lookin' in my closet for somn nice an pink to wear
CheviSoSexxi (8:45:55 PM): an i juss stopped an was
like "i kno i aint tryin' to pick somn out to wear to my
boy funeral...then i laffed" an got there
CheviSoSexxi (8:46:53 PM): wen i got there i was in the
pew w/ my motha an i was cool seen all my folks they spoke
an noo oen was cryin'
CheviSoSexxi (8:47:15 PM): so wen the service started an
his brother spoke...an his daddy..i was still cool
CheviSoSexxi (8:47:52 PM): they started playin' this one
song....an my momma was singin' the words or w.e.....thats
wen i started askin' her to tell me this was a dream
CheviSoSexxi (8:48:47 PM): she grabbed me an held me...a
tear dropped down her cheek.....an i was like "Nooo"
CheviSoSexxi (8:49:32 PM): i buried my head in her chest
while she rocked me like a baby.....i was cryin' sooo much
i could feel folks touchin' me....then i got the nerve to
go up there cuz i still aint wan believe it
CheviSoSexxi (8:50:11 PM): i did....i touched his hand an
i was like....get up freddy...c'mon dude lets go man..
CheviSoSexxi (8:50:39 PM): an he aint get up...so i
screamed "why u layin' there?" an he aint get up ma
CheviSoSexxi (8:51:38 PM): i fell to my knees an cried
till my eyes were swollen....my motha came down all the
way from where we were sittin'
CheviSoSexxi (8:52:40 PM): an got on the ground w/ me
LayDMiya160 (8:53:10 PM): awwww
LayDMiya160 (8:53:24 PM): thats deep as hell
LayDMiya160 (8:53:27 PM): Im somethin like speechless
CheviSoSexxi (8:53:32 PM): chea...me 2
LayDMiya160 (8:54:24 PM): U gone be alright
LayDMiya160 (8:55:21 PM): ???????
CheviSoSexxi (8:55:34 PM): its crazy...cuz i mean like
CheviSoSexxi (8:56:43 PM): everyone will comfort u wen
somn like that happends while u mourn but then wha bout 6
months lata wen u have dreams an u missin' this person???
aint no one there...
LayDMiya160 (8:57:27 PM): Im here
CheviSoSexxi (8:58:30 PM): yea..
LayDMiya160 (9:00:26 PM): I dont kno cuz I was just crying
earlier today when I was in the tub my mommy obituary is
in the bathroom in a bible and i was readin it and i just
started crying mad hard
LayDMiya160 (9:02:20 PM): i mean i couldnt stop then i
started thinkin bout the funeral and how much i miss her
and how at the funeral i was hugging her an di didnt want
to let her go my p eeps had to pull me off of her and how
at the hospital i saw her on lying on the hospital bed
dead and i was trying to wake her up I mean i tried
everything from CPR to praying
LayDMiya160 (9:02:39 PM): and nothin would bring her back
and how hurt i am and hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
CheviSoSexxi (9:03:16 PM): man.....i can't imagine....but
u kno wha
CheviSoSexxi (9:04:02 PM): rii before i woke up i was
standin' by my motha casket at her funeral holdin' her
hand while people walked up to say goodbye
CheviSoSexxi (9:04:21 PM): that wha fuked me up in my
dream....i woke up sweatin' an cryin'...
CheviSoSexxi (9:05:51 PM): man...shit an if that wasn't
euff wen i got up guess wha....a song by envouge was
playin' called im missing you
LayDMiya160 (9:06:59 PM): Im not trying to scare you or
nothin ma but those are signs
CheviSoSexxi (9:07:49 PM): i kno..thats wha i said...soon
as i woke up i wanted to call my grandma but i aint wan
LayDMiya160 (9:07:51 PM): and GOd is preparing u for
somebodies death not saying that its gone be ur moms but
somebody..........I didnt even have a chance to be
prepared it just happened spontaneously
CheviSoSexxi (9:08:53 PM): yeah...i dun kno how to be
prepared ma....i mean wha im pose to do...imma give my
self a damn heart attack
LayDMiya160 (9:09:32 PM): I kno thats why Im the way I am
LayDMiya160 (9:10:05 PM): I mad mean, always crying,
always mad, dont care about peoples feelings, scared to
get close to someone cuz i fear im gone lose them
CheviSoSexxi (9:13:02 PM): i've been to plenty of
funerals...mostyly old ppl in my family...that was sooo
sooo much diff. than freddy's an it hit me a whole diff.
way....cuz i mean that was my boy an i had just met his
motha less than a week ago then before my eyes they were
both gone..thats y ppl are like ch3vi aint like ya'll were
datin'....he was juss ur friend...but im like dude....that
was my boy..seen him everyday an listened to his cd's...
just to let you know even though your mad at me i'm here
for you when you have dreams like that.. and don't feel
alone cuz i still have them too.. and i still think about
it everyday too.... i love you girl..... and i'm gonna
always be here