Funny how one day your life is so carefree and you really
haev nothing to think about and then you wake up adn you
realize that their are bills to be paid and a million of
other things running in your mind.
I am turning 29 tommorrow and I am like so freaked out I
mean I never been in love I thought I have. I met someone
and for 8 dayz my emotions were in such a whirl wind it was
kinda freaky one minute I was happy and then the next I
didnt know what to think. I mean this guy brought the best
out in my and the worst out in me. I never thought I can
meet someone cho couls do that. I miss home so much I dont
know what to think. I told him that I would never date a
guy with kids. But being the nice person that I am I told
him that just so it would be easier on him I mean it is
like dang. He told me he only thinks of me as a good friend
I was just to niceI never thought that being nice was a bad
thing. I guess that is the way everything goes in my life.
I am jsut a to nice of a person and I dont know what to do
about it. I mean it is sad to be nice. I think it is not.
But even if I wanted to be a mean person I couldnt.
I like him so much and I think I would do anything just for
him. But the thing is he wont give me a chance. I know he
misses me because why else would he call me jsut to tell me
about his day. GOSH I dont know I am going insanely nutz. I
couldnt sleep till 6 am the first night he left, and I have
been at my sisters ever since then. I dont know what to
think I so want to be with him. But I know I am just his
friend. Oh well Single till the end for me I guess.
my thoughts for the day.
DECEMBER 26, 2004