DayDream Believer
2004-12-23 09:58:01 (UTC)


I decided to spend christmas even with my mother and
sisters at my aunts place. I think Tommy is dissapointed,
he was hoping to the end that I would come to his
grandmother. But I dont like his family all that much, I
dont belong there. Mybe if he LOVED me I would go this
year, but he dosst, at least not as I know so it would be
wrong. Tommy dossnt feel that way, but we are verry
diffrent when it comes to emotions.
I went home yesterday, my father was verry verry drunk.
Im a bit sad, no one could take care of my dog. I love her,
shes a great dog, verry nice and friendly but there are so
much going on right now at home, my mother is exhusted,
verry stressed and sad. it is allmost impossible to find an
appartment where they will allow dogs, if it wassnt I might
have moved and take her with me, and Tommy is allergic to
dogs so she cant stay inside, but need a dog house for her
own. He likes dogs, so we ofthen take ours for a walk when
we are home, but he is allergic and cant have them inside.
My dog wassnt getting the attention and walks she needed,
so I took the verry hard dessition to let her go. My mon
took her to our vetrinerian. He is a verry nice man, a
friend of the family, he understood and took her out of her
missary. My mom was verry sad it had to go this way, me to.
I could not even go there. But he called aftherwords in
case my father made any trubble , and told that it was over
and had gone well. No pain, first he gave her someting so
she would sleep, then he took her out of life. I feel
awfull, and is really upset with my self.
He said I did the right thing, beeing a resonsible pet
owner and everyting, but I feel missreble. How could I do
this to my own dog that I love so much?
I sendt a message to Tommy, he called to make sure I was
allright, I was not allright and started crying. He was sad
to. I will never forgive my self for this, but at least she
is allright now.
When I got her I did not have an allergic boy friend, my
plan was to take her with me when I moved and spend her
whole life with me.

I`ve brught great presents to everyone this year, spent a
furtune. So I hope everyone like what they gets. Im in the
city now on my way to Tommys place to wait for him to come
home. Im sleeping there until tomorrow the go to my aunt,
after that there are no busses back to the town. So me,
Karoline and mum are sleeping at my other aunts house, my
mum and karoline are having dinner with a third aunt on
christmas day and then they drive to to Tommy. The day
afther wars is my family party so I have to go back. There
have been a lot of back and forward from home at the farm
to home at Tommys. I call them bout home, witch is really
comfusing for everyone.

I hope everyone have a great christmas, I`ll try my best to
have it to. Love Angel