My Gay Misadventures
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2004-12-18 07:58:38 (UTC)

i hate multipal choice.

Durr ---- Lately iv been goin through some major, and must I
add, Annoying, revalations these past few weeks. Its like my
emotional being has come to a fork in the insight road. Ima
stab it. I mean, Im currently dateing Jonne; That English
brit who while may be good in the sac, Lacks in every other
feild. Then there is my crush with some dude online who wont
even give me the time a day...Evan, that str8 fucker who is
nothing more then a muse...wait...scratch that...Cocktease.
Then there is Jared; my old off again - on again flame with
a redheaded intellectual. ..Speakin of which, Ima maybe-
prolly-knock on wood see him this comeing Sunday.

Not to mention the whole "What to do come march" scenerios..
.cuz yea, the lease is up. And I have to make huge decisons
pretty damn fast. I can either Stay here in San Antonio,
Live alone, and get either a raise or higher paying job...Go
live with mom again in a home she and her bf will move into.
..or Move to Louisianna in hopes that the suggestion Jared
made of their low cost of liveing will hold up...Iv never
been so bound and unsure what to do...Where the fuck is the
fast forward button?

Iv also been sexually frustrated UP THE ASS (no pun
intended) I mean, Yea, i get to screw jonne every now and
then, but im just not plump attracted to him and he is me. I
want someone i can say "Oh yea, your hot, and your mine" not
"well, other people think your hot, but i dont, but your
mine...blah" ....yea...thats what I say...well, prolly wont
log again till after Sunday...lets hope against hope.