Goodnight, Starlight.

2004-11-27 19:40:37 (UTC)

Nov 27th

Today has turned out bad already. I was just talking to
Jake, then we got in a fight. He blocked and deleted me. So
i did the same. Yous see, i want to push him out of my
life, but i just dont want to, because i think that it
could end up great. That everything will be fine again.
Even though in the back of my head, its saying nothing will
ever be good between us, i still think it will. But, i
guess i took the chance. Now im never going to talk to him
again. Its hard. But i need to realize he isnt worth it.
And that he just made everything harder.
Now im having second thoughts about going out with Greg.
This is what i think. Us claiming that we are going out is
just weird. because its only holding us back from doing
other things, with other people. Even though him and I like
eachother a lot, "Claiming" we go out isnt doing anything
for us. The fact that we dont get to see eachother makes it
worse. Doing this just makes me feel like im in a corner,
surrounded by nothing, but im not able to escape. To me,
this isnt a real relationship, and I have things going for
me here. I cant do it. Kendra, I need you. I need to talk
to you. You're my best friend right now. I love you. I need
your advice on what to do. Help me. =(
See, Mumbles likes me, a lot. And Chris likes me. I like
Mumbles. But im with Greg. I dont know what to do. And i
cant stop analyzing things. Because it just makes it worse.
Billy talent concert with Kendra on new years eve. Im so
excited. You dont even know. I want to go to the Pavilion
on new Years Eve Eve to see The PGods and the JOEL PLASKETT
EMERGANCY!!!!!. Fuck. Kendra, I want you to go to that with
me. It would be amazing. 2 concerts in a row. Then on the
17th or 18th of Dec, Lightning Rad is playing at the
Pavilion. I want to go to that too. Oh well. We'll see.
Time for me to go.

Kendra, if you ever read this, you are my best friend. You
always have been. I love you so much (as a friend =P). You
dont know how much you mean to me. I hope you're always
there for me. And you know I'm always there for you, no
matter what happens. I love you.

Mood - Depressed/Sad/Confused/Frustrated. =*(

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