Codesmith

Life, Or Something Like It
2004-10-24 07:38:41 (UTC)

A Chance To Write Again

It's 1024, Sunday. 252am. The sound of silence, ... it's
the sound of night. At least, from within my room. I know
that night doesn't usually sound so quiet, at least not in
the jungle. There's geckos, crickets, the wind, ... things
that move through the foilage. Frogs. Snakes. I hate
reptiles and amphibians in general.

I didn't write "yesterday". I wasn't really on the
computer all that much. I was for awhile, but ... not
really online.

So I'll start off with how the day started. I woke up
around 1pm, and I went online. I had some breakfast, which
consisted of left overs from Applebees. I know I shouldn't
have really eaten any of that sort of food, but since the
girls really wanted to eat out I thought it wouldn't hurt
just this once.

Afterwards, I decided to read up on some old technical
books that I have ... that I never got around to reading.
They just kind of sit on my shelf and collect dust.

For about a few hours I was just reading and writing some
simple programs to test out what I learned. The therapist
came by to hang out with me and Lisa. That was fun for
awhile. The therapist and I played online for a bit. I
really wanted to get some time alone so I could write in
my journal and email someone, but I never got the chance.
At least till now.

So that was about ... 10 maybe 8 hours ago. My math
abilities are a bit dented when I stay up this late. But
in truth, despite me being tired ... I find this relaxing.
If that makes any sense. I think it's because it's ...
something of a nightly ritual. To stay up most of the
night, and then sleep most of the morning, I mean.

Oh I forgot to mention. Elle came online today. Actually
she came online yesterday, but I didn't get to write
either last night. So Elle and I were talking for a bit
today ... it was pretty great to have her back online.

I'll describe how it went yesterday. She came online and I
was like, ... pretty happy. We kinda did our usual smiley
banters and of course, we talked about a few things. It
was kinda quiet between us though ... I think for me, at
any rate, it was because I was just so surprised to see
her there that I didn't really know what to say. I told
her that I felt that way, and she said ... well you know
I'm tired so that's why I'm not saying much either.

Although she was tired, she stayed online for about two
hours or so. So I thought that was pretty cool. I asked
her a question concerning relationships. In truth, I've
asked most of my female friends the same question ... that
is, whether they would or would not wait for someone they
wanted ... but who was already in a relationship with
someone. There were only two people who answered yes. A
person who lives far away, and ... Elle.

I thought it was ... curious to say that she would. I sort
of wanted to think that it was maybe that she was waiting
for me. But then, ... I don't know. I mean, I am the one
who did bring up the question. She gave me an honest
answer. It would be illogical to consider that her answer
was somehow directed towards me in some subtle fashion.

Although it's a nice thought.

So anyhow, we talked about stuff ... she told me about the
new things happening at her school. I told her the new
stuff happening at my school. Things like that.

Speaking of school ... So yesterday we went out to
applebees. But prior to that we went to Barnes and Noble.
Although I don't know why we go there, cause ... we
never buy anything there. So the girls and I go inside,
and of course the first thing we do is wander to the new
releases and the bargain table. The bargain table seemed
to be filled with all these books written by Leo Tolstoy.
It was kinda weird. Right around then we kinda split off
to some other parts of the store. For me, I always vist
the humor section, the technical section, science
fiction section, self-help section, medical section, and
then history section. In that particular order. Partly
because ... that's just kinda how the store is laid out,
and those are the only books that really appeal to me.

I didn't make my rounds though, because I was kinda
waylaid by a guy in technical, who tried to start a
conversation with me. I don't know why ... maybe it was
because I was the only other body in the technical
section. He was talking to me about a number of
things, ... like hacking. I found out that he was also a
programmer and networker. He runs his own webserver, has
four computers, and a dedicated router in the form of a
computer that has BSD installed on it. Actually BSD is
installed on all the machines. His webserver is listening
on port 99; I only remember because that's not a
traditional port to be serving pages. Also, ... did I
mention he was really into hacking?

At first I was really, really uncomfortable talking to
him. Since, it was all about hacking and programming ...
and I'm just not really that open about those sort of
things. It's not that the topic makes me uncomfortable and
awkward, it's just that ... it's not really something you
talk about first thing when you meet someone. I mean, I
don't initiate a conversation with the first topic being
about Hawking's latest theory on the Universe. I mean
that's great you're into it and all, but ... do I know
you?

However, I did find our conversations pretty informative
and I realized that he knew quite a few things that I
didn't know. Which I guess isn't really that hard to do,
if you don't slack off as much as I do. So when it
occurred to me that this guy knew more than I did, I
decided to alter my plan of escaping, and instead
implement a plan of getting him to talk as much as I
could ... about everything. So I asked him a ton of
question about a variety of things that hackers would
know. His answers, were ... needless to say, a bit
conflicting. I mean some of his answeres did reveal that
he did know what he was talking about. Yet some of his
other answers were like ... well, ... kinda something I'd
expect of someone who was new. Although I have to stress
that he did know more than me. It's just that through the
conversation we had, it became more obvious to me that the
sorts of things he knew and what I knew, could be
construed as different sorts of genres within the same
field.

Like for instance, he talks about programming. I tried to
talk to him about data structures and things like that.
Btrees, efficient storage algorithms, things like that.
But it's like he didn't really know much about those. In
fact, he didn't know anything about those. I was going to
talk to him about high level mathematics ... and the use
of prime numbers in hashtables and encryption, but then I
was like ... what's the point in asking? It's like all he
knew was how to program. Which is useful, but most of
computer science is about designing various data
structures which are ... well, useful.

He was talking to me about exploits. Like, gaining root on
a machine. He talked about one, which I can't recall the
name of, and in fact he couldn't remember the name of
either ... so I asked him how the exploit worked.

It's just occurred to me that maybe he didn't tell me
because he didn't really want to divulge that sort of
information to me. But, considering how he was so open
with me about everything else ... I don't think that might
have been the case. Also considering the other things he
talked about, ... it's as if the things he knows are just
things he gleaned from books and other people. Not
anything that's original in anyway.

Like about the exploit ... he didn't go into any great
detail about how it worked. In fact, he didn't know how it
worked. At least, ... that was my impression. It's as if
he just knew how to use it, and that it worked on some
machines, ... but he didn't know what "made it tick".

He also did talk quite a bit about chatting online. In
particular, yahoo chat. Public chatrooms just isn't my
thing anymore. Online messenging, is. He said he owns a
chat client ... which he wrote totally in "Ruby". I've
never heard of that language before, ... but apparently
it's used quite a bit in Japan. It's an interpreter
language, and I really hate interpreter languages. But
then again Java is something of an interpreter language.
It's like half that and half machine code.

All in all, I found the experience quite interesting. We
talked about Kevin Mitnick, OS security, Programming,
Networks, Sockets, and a ton of other stuff. He knew more
than I did. Maybe about 66% more than I did. But the
things I knew, were more ... specialized. If that makes
sense. The stuff he knew and the stuff I knew differed
greatly, in that the things I knew were more of a
theoretical, industrial grade skills. Well, sorta. The
stuff he knew, were more of like ... like a hodgepodge of
information that he had learned all on his own from books
and consulting online information. I was really impressed.
I think he knew more things than all the undergrads in my
department.

So later on in the night when I saw Elle for the first
time in two weeks, I told Elle about this guy I met at
Barnes and Noble. I sort of posed the situation as being
humorously strange. But then Elle offered my an
alternative perspective, ... which was that maybe he was
just lonely, and that's why he wanted to talk to me. He
saw someone with similar interests, and he wanted to
converse.

It struck me then, that it was quite possible that was the
case. It does account for many nuances in the
conversation. Nuances, like ... when he told me what
certifications are worth the money. What OS is most
secure. Interesting things to do onlinr. It's as if he
wanted me to like him. But then again, hackers have a
thing with pride. That is, they like to be praised. Which
is a strategy I utilized, in my attempt to keep him
talking. And talking I did get him to do. For about an
hour and fifteen minutes.

But that's got to be one of the things that I absolutely
love about Elle. She's ... so nice. Sure, there are times
when we are mean to people and mean towards each other.
But ... deep down she's really nice. It's not that I'm
saying that or anything. Her actions really speak volumes
about her character. And at times, I find myself wondering
if maybe I've stumbled upon the world's last nice chick.

That and she's just so mature. I really find that
attractive as well.

Well I'll end this here. I want to write someone, and I
haven't gotten the chance till now. So I will do that, and
end this entry here. On another note, my asthma is getting
worse. The cold season is coming upon this city, and along
with it the dry air. The air is what appears to be
irritating my lungs.




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