Hakerz338

Grass is Greener on the Other Side
2004-10-11 10:26:54 (UTC)

the weekend

All this weekend, I've thought about LSR. How on earth
things got this way. I blame myself. For entering her life,
for making her lie to her parents, for putting her in this
position. Sigh...I love her. She wants me to move on,
everyone wants me to move on. I can't. I still believe in
us. I need to talk to her, because all this writing can be
taken incorrectly. In fact it has. On of my early entries,
I wrote You proved to me hate was a stronger emotion than
love. That entry was about LSR in the top section, and that
line was directed towards her parents not her. Her parents
because they HATED ME, their hate towards me lead to the
pressure that broke us. She however took it to be her. I
know she loved me, I hope she still does. I still love her.
A user on her forum, called me an idiot and so forth, she
however did not stand up for me. I guess that hurt as much.
Even now, I've stood up to all my friends who down her,
hell I've almost been in fights. It's fine. No one
understands. No one understands me. I wanted LSR to tell me
everything was going to be ok, in Sept, to tell me she
loved me, that she'd stay by my side. She didn't reassure
me. We broke up. I wanted her to tell me she still thinks
of me. She didn't. Sigh... I need her more now than
anything. I love her. O GOD, I'm dieing inside so much. I
spent the weekend talking to some friends. They made me
feel so juvenile. Jeff, told me that Love doesn't exist,
and that one girl, isn't real. I'm naive, that I'm young. I
have no idea. It hurts, hurts to breathe. So much. I know
what love is. I know it exists, and I know the one is
there. LSR. I know your hurting because I'm hurting a
thousand times more. For once reassure me. Please. That you
still believe in us, in love. I'm sorry, please forgive me.
I'm afraid of losing you. I love you so much, that it hurts.


I'm so down, maybe I'm out.

6:26AM




Ad: