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2004-08-26 07:24:20 (UTC)

Brush with death

Had another round with the reaper today.

Crohn's attack - hospitalized until 1:30am this morning.
I just had my last appointment Tuesday and felt fine...
then today happened.

Misty is apparently still listed as my next of kin and for
some reason, a stupid one I'm sure since we are talking
about me - I haven't had the inclination to change that
yet. Maybe I think she might want to see me live so I can
give for money. I dunno. Maybe it just reminds me of a
time when I used to think I had value to someone even if I
never ultimately did at all nor do I ever expect to. It's
been proven again and again what is really important to
other people - themselves, what they want, and money. I
only fit into that if I can give to one of those three,
and I only tend to do so to people who pretend I matter to
them for the time being.

Anyway - today totally sucked. Breezy is gone - perhaps
for a long time now. She might be moving but is gone for
the week regardless. But at least Evolve is coming up.
At least there is that.

If I can just get my paycheck I'm laughing. I am
starving - and not just for food.


Today sucked.

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