poeticgem

My sometimes coherent thoughts
2004-08-22 10:15:38 (UTC)

He writes poetry

Here is a poem Chris wrote just for me:

The new woman arises full of confidence she speaks
eloquently and thinks independently
Full of strength she organizes efficiently and directs
proudly
She is the new woman capable of changing the course of
society

also, tonight, after we said our good byes on the phone, he
said he was going to bed because he had taken a Vicadin for
the pain his hand ... but not more than 30 minutes later,
he sent a 'music greeting' ... the song with greeting
was 'I wanna know what love is' by Foriegner and the
message he sent was another poem he wrote just for me.

Here is that poem:

pink orchid of love
fragrant flower so rare
of desire's full bloom
nestled in that glade
below your mossy rise

my tongue, a hummingbird
hungry for passions nectar
hovering above you, wanting
to drink so deep, and long
till my thirst is quenched

my hungry heart is filled
but for a short blissful time
then hungry again, takes wing
to drink deeply of you again
sweet pink orchid of desire

~chris~

^^^^^^^^^^^^

I've yearned to connect with a man on this level, have a
man write me poetry, express to me his thoughts, feelings
articulately & creatively in both verbal and written
form ... I may have come across one or two of those type of
men in my life and not even recognized them because I
wasn't ready ... I do believe that God truly knows when we
are ready for things to happen, when we are strong enough
to endure hard times, how much we can handle, and when we
are ready to accept and recognize the rewards for the
trials and tribulations we've suffered and survived ...

It amazes me that I feel the way I do about Chris and in
such a short time. I mean, I feel as if I can finally let
go of Harry ... part of me feels bad for him, but part of
me feels it's ok to be happy and move on ... it's strange
how I really genuinely like Chris and yet I hardly know
him, and even stranger is how quickly and quietly Harry's
and my relationship has ended ... and at this particular
moment, at 3:10 in the morning, I can sit here and write
this without a tear in my eye ... that all those memories,
that thinking about all the years with Harry, that it
almost doesn't hurt to remember and to let go ...

ALMOST ... I stil haven't mustered the nerve to make it
official, and I know I'm the one who's going to have to do
it ... but after tonight, if nothing else has been obvious,
reality will probably start setting in. We were supposed
to get together (MY IDEA OF COURSE) and I simply flaked ...
I didn't even follow through on calling him back as I said
I would ... and I have no desire to talk with him or to be
with him ... not that I don't feel any sadness at all ...
but the prospect of starting fresh, really and truly fresh
and actually having feelings for someone like Chris, well
there's just no option anymore ... the past holds no
comfort for me now ... I might honestly have a future to
look forward to ... and that thought alone is enough to
motivate me to let go of the ties that bind and have bound
me to a past that serves no purpose but to hold me back and
keep me living in the shadows.

Of course I'm a little scared, not to admit that would be
foolish ... but God's purpose and design is not always
revealed ... I do believe that He's not brought me this far
just to drop me on my head ... so if I just get out of His
way and have a fair amount of trust in Him then I think
things will unfold in a most positive manner ...

ok, I'd better get some sleep ... gotta leave the house by
1:00/1:30 tomorrow to meet my dad near Palm Springs to
bring Chantelle back home. OH, by the by, my dad thought
Chris sounded nice - I'm not sure if I mentioned that
already or not ....




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