krazygirl

Wo ist Amanda?
2004-08-15 05:47:06 (UTC)

It's been a while...did you see the Raiders win?

Yes, yes, I haven't written in this thing for a long
while. Things happen...you know. Well, I am graduated and
in college. Fun. Not really.
Everything in my life is pretty good at the moment, and
anything that isn't good...well, I block it out most of the
time. Those sort of things come out at night when I'm
trying to sleep! So, naturally, I don't sleep as much as I
would like to.
I got a Cal Grant of about 15 hundred dollars and that is
what I'm depending on to pay for my books this semester. I
have a babysitting job in Valley Springs (45 minutes from
where I live) and I get to tutor the little shits for about
600 a month and a free van. Not bad. My family life is
pretty good, except my uncle was supposed to fix my '74
pink Volkswagon bug for me...but nothing has happened to it
in like four months. Sucks. I WISH I UNDERSTOOD CARS
MORE!!! Best of all, my team kicked ass tonight in the
preseason game with the gay 49ers!!! Woo hoo!!!! It's a
Raider nation, no doubt!
Anyways, all is good except my love life. Well, I have no
love life. That's the problem. Another problem is that I
secretly find myself sorta falling for this little 13 year
old guy...my little sister's friend. I hang out with him
on a regular basis, without my sister knowing....I don't
want her to feel left out or mad or anything (she likes
him) But I'm 18 years old and I can't understand this
feeling. I think I'm just lonely and this guy has been the
best guy friend I've had in a while. He's fun to be with,
we get along so great, he's not as immature as all the
other guys his age (not to say he isn't immature, he IS
13!) It's not like I'm attracted to him physically, I'm no
child molestor, geez. I just want a guy I can relate to
and have fun with. I don't know...guess I'm really fucked
up, and really lonely. Am I that ugly? That's the only
thing I can think of because I KNOW I'm a great person to
be around! I'm fun, what can I say?! Well, I'm out I
guess. Don't expect anyone to really read this anyways.
Peace.
Amanda The Panda




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