Codesmith

Life, Or Something Like It
2004-08-14 18:55:01 (UTC)

12 Hours Before The Wedding Ceremony

NOTE: Because I wasn't able to successfully add this entry
at the time it was finished, I saved this entry for a time
when I would be able to add this to my journal. It appears
now, with a pretty inaccurate time stamp.

It's 445am. Early morning, without the sightest hint of
what time it is. Maybe it's just me, ... but I think I can
actually notice a slight increase in light. Sunrise is not
due for roughly two hours, ... yet, I think I can see
light. Maybe because I am, ... use to this. Or maybe, I
just know what time it is.

This is Saturday, the 14th of August, 2004. The wedding
vow renewal ceremony is today, and as an invited guest I
am obligated to ... "witness" the occassion. As the
youngest person there, I think I might be a little out of
place. The youngest person might be Greg's girlfriend, ...
assuming Greg visits with his girlfriend. I think she's
about a year or so younger than I.

I've been working out for about a little over a month. I'm
glad to say that the girls have commented on my evolving
physique. I was standing next to Lisa, watching a bit of
t.v before I was about to go into the kitchen. She looked
at me and commented on how much better I look. The
therapist told me in private, in no uncertain terms, that
she approved of the change.

It serves to stroke an oversized ego of mine.

I'm still asthmatic though. But that will change as soon
as I start the running regime. In short, my overall plan
was to build up strength before I build up agility. It
might have been a better plan to choose to improve agility
before improving strength. But, I'm an impatient kind of
person. I like to see results relatively quickly. So I
picked strength over agility first. ... And results, are
what I am getting ...

I check my email everyday. At least twice. Once within the
first hour of waking up, ... if I can help it. And the
second time is during the end of the day before I head to
bed. In reality, I probably check my email alot more than
twice a day.

I notice on the site where I check my email ... that there
are quite a many links to articles written by
the ... "talented" writers of MSN News. I've notice that
alot of the articles preport to have tips or advice
to "be" that perfect someone. Whether it be in a
relationship, physical training, or maybe career wise
goals ... these fields which people seem to traditionally
experience the most problems advancing in are targeted by
the article writers of MSN News.

I've noticed that they tend to follow the same template.
That is, they all seem to have a clever catch phrase,
like ... "Top 10 mistakes said in an Interview" or "7
steps to marital bliss". Things like that.

I just find alot of them to be rather annoying. Probably
becauase some of them try to convince people to change
themselves from one sort of person to another sort of
person. To change and become someone else completely in
order to achieve some goal or need that is probably
artifically created by marketing ploys or prejudiced
communities in which these people reside.

Then again, maybe I just really hate people who are
happier than me.

Do I? Hm ... Maybe.

Yes on some level I might not enjoy it when someone is
happier than I. But I think that everyone is like that. I
think it's derived from this culture's version
of, "schadenfreude" ... to take pleasure from someone's
misfortune.

Or I guess, ... another way of saying it ... "Misery loves
company".

Um, but whatever it is really ... I think I just hate MSN
News articles. I think I'll leave it at that instead of
trying to come up with something overly complicated and
unnecessary.

Anyway, the ceremony starts today. It begins at 6pm, and I
think it's going to last till around 10pm. I guess I'm not
really worried, but there is something that kind of
bothers me. The dancing. I heard very horrible rumors that
there will be dancing involved in this ... "party" as they
call it.

I'm ashamed to say this, but ... I'm not much of a dancer.
Not even contempoary. Not like the sort of "grind" dancing
which is most popular nowadays. No. I can honestly say I'm
probably the worst there ever was/is. But I have a feeling
that the people attending this ceremony thing, people ages
50-60, aren't going to be "grinding". And if they are ...
ugh ... the images ... gawd, I can feel it burn inside my
head ...

Actually, I have a feeling ... Oh my gawd. I had the most
horrible thought. What if they want to do "swing" dancing?
Fuck.

Well ... if it comes down to that, ... I think I'm going
to have to put my jungle survival skills to use and just
try to fucking camouflage with the punch table or
something.

I'm probably over exaggerating. It can't possibly be that
bad. Considering the nature of most people ages 50-60 ...,
it probably won't be the case I'll see any dancing. I
mean ... dancing? Please ...

Well it can't be that bad. I mean, I guess there could be
alot worse things. I can't really think of any though.

I guess I can look towards more positive things ... like
at least I'll get fed.

It has dawned on me though that for the four or so hours
there I might have to intermingle with Lisa's step
brothers and sisters ... their respective spouses and
significant others. Not out of politeness ... but because
we probably of the somewhat age similarities.

I guess I don't really mind because Jodi is the only one
there who attempts to be civil to everyone. Although, Greg
and David ... well that's different. Amy ... now that's a
totally different case. I don't think Amy has ever tried
to really talk with me. I'm not sure if this is the result
of shyness or because ... as Lisa put it, Amy likes to
talk about herself and only herself ... but whatever it
is, I guess I can count Amy out of any possible
conversation. Not that I mind in the least.

I guess it's kind of weird that I'm talking about all
these people whom I've never really mentioned before. I'm
not sure why I never mentioned ... Oh that's right. Cause
I rarely see them except on certain occassions such as
this or Christmas/Thanksgiving. I think next time I will
take the time to archive them properly in here. For ...
um, archival reasons ... yea ...

Well, with that said I think I'll end this entry here.
Hopefully, today will go well.




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