7.28.04 I'm Still a Kid
it has come to my attention that I am still a kid:
nothing in between adult and boy, no teenager, definitely
not a man, and *looks down* pretty sure I'm not a woman.
That makes me a child.
I've come to this conclusion by observing my everyda
behavior, and then observing the behaviors of men, women,
grown ppl, etc. What do they do? They do what needs to get
done, and they do it usually when it needs to get done. Not
always exactly as with the latter, particularly with the
adults in MY life, but things get done. They know they got
responsibilitis, and the address them.
Me? Nah...I have some responsibilities...they say all
people NEED responsibility. But even as I think, there is
not one responsibility in my entire life in which I have
not (a) made a game out of, or (b), neglected. I gotta
start doin somethin haha...I'm 16, and I'm not askin to run
an empire, but I have got to be stop being so lazy and
carefreee. There, as my history teacher told me, will be
apoint in every student's life in which he just gets up and
does things, wants aside, and needs first. I neef that to
happen now. Because to be honest, I'm a mess! I mean, even
with the almost nonexistent responsibilities I have now,
everything gets neglected. I suppose besides prayer a way
to help myself would be to fail a few times, and suffer
those consequences. It will only be then, I guess, when
this life of mine actually begins to become something.
Cause now it's like a joke. If you're a reader here, gimme
some help, as always, I like hearin from ya