- Jessica -

- Stuck In A World Of Sin -
2004-06-11 05:25:44 (UTC)

A Rock Stuck In A Hard Place

Hey-

Well, I had a lot of fun bowling and stuff. Turns out
that Cody didn't go. The people who went were Robert,
Morgan, Michael, me, and Emily (my sister). It was fun,
but I never realized how badly I sucked at bowling. lol.
I talked to Michael about Cody.. and it turns out
that they're basically related. He told me that Cody isn't
a really bad guy. And that he would like it if we went
out. I
still don't know, but the things that Michael tells me
about him made me a lot more comfortable with the fact
that Cody might show up. (But he didn't)
I still want to get to know him.. and I want to
before I leave on Wednesday for Vegas. So Michael was
supposed to ask him if he wanted to go to the movies with
me tomorrow night. But there's one problem......Lance may
be there. I will be SO uncomfortable with the both of them
there! It's going to be torture for me! lol.
I just hope that everything works out alright. Maybe
Lance wont go, or maybe Cody wont go. I want Lance to be
there.. because I haven't seen him in a really long time.
It would be nice to see him. :) (Really nice!) lol. Then
again, I want Cody to go so that I can get to spend some
time with him and talk to him about stuff before I leave.
I just don't want both of them there. I mean.. I have
a bad feeling that I'm going to be in Vegas.. thinking
about Lance again. I mean, I not only thought about him in
Vagas.. I thought about him at the Grand Canyon, at the
Hoover Dam, and most of all in Hawaii. I was miserable
because all I thought about was him.. wishing that he was
there with me. Too bad that's not the way he feels. :(
Even though that was last year.. I feel like this
year am I not only going to think about Lance, but also
about Cody. But something deep down doesn't want me to
think about Cody. I can't explain it... it's just the way
I feel. Ugh- I don't know. I hope Michael didn't call
him.. because I liked Lance before Cody.. and I will like
Lance after Cody. (If that makes any sence) lol. Lance is
the one that I want to be with most.. and I know that he's
worth waiting for. But even knowing that... it's still
going to be
hard for me to let go of Cody.. he came into my life so
quickly, and something tells me that it's going to take a
lot
longer for me to let him leave. (If that makes any
sence)
- Jess




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