A hidden lover
2004-05-16 06:46:13 (UTC)

My oldest lover

Katrina, I loved you. I loved you more than life itself.
You were my first love. I didn't have a lot in my life
when I met you. You filled so many empty spaces in me. I
have known many women since you, and none have ever
touched me the way you did. I often wonder what became of
you, if you achieved your dreams, if you're happy, if you
have any children, if you're even still alive. Wherever
you are, I wish you the best. You're always with me,
you're always in my mind, you'll always be in my heart. I
never hurt you, I never gave you a reason to leave, and I
never chased you after you left. I've also never been able
to let you go. I will always regret that I didn't try one
more time, especially that last time I saw you all those
years after you left me. We spent those last hours
together talking, and I should have tried. It is one of
the few regrets of my life so far. But the time is gone,
life is different now. I hope that someday I will not
think about you anymore. When that day comes I hope I am
not aware of it so that you are truly gone. If I realize
you're gone then you'll be back.

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