jen

Too Much to Say
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2004-05-13 20:31:46 (UTC)

doubts and discouragement

i find that the more i try to do god's work the more i
get attacked by satan (or whatever darkness it is that
opposes god.) now that i've kicked the old habits (no
thanks to myself...that was all god) the "devil" is finding
new ways to throw me off. DOUBT. ever since i took that
god-awful bib-lit class my faith in the bible has never
been the same. and needless to say, my faith in the bible
affects my faith in god/jesus. and i HATE it! it's one
thing to fight a battle with your heart, but how do you
fight with your own mind?! Everything my professor said
MADE SENSE. and i've yet to find anything that will prove
him wrong. i search and i search, but everything to me
only seems to further his point. and yet i KNOW he's
wrong. i have to stay the course. escpecially now. god
IS real, jesus IS his son, and his word IS living.

"I've begged you for some proof
for my thomas eyes to see.
A slithering staff, leprous hands,
and lions resting lazily.

A glimpse of your backside glory
and this soaked alter going a blaze,
But you know i've seen so much.
I explained it away!!!

MY FAITH IS LIKE SHIFTING SAND..."


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