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i cant be happy for you
you only bring me down.
you understand me so well we pretend
but it has to be pretend because despite
moments of synchrony
you move in circles around
which is where we never explore
the exact place where
even what we share can be destroyed
and we pretend like we are stronger than that
and maybe you are
but i'm not.
and dont you dare toy with me
or use me
or leave me or forget me anymore
you are pushing certain limits
that cannot be broken
like a fast car breaking through time
the portal can never be reopened
to return to the same life
so wake up and realize
everything i have held so precious
in a single mention
now you want it
everything you didnt want until i did
everyone you didnt like
until you were sick of me.
i've been through this before
it hurts like hell
you know i fear it
you still indulge in it
never pausing long enough in your ramblings
maybe this is killing me.