Theres only one you

Beautiful Disaster
2004-05-05 06:36:07 (UTC)

Feed back on secret

Ok this is from Beccas Diary

Secret.

Want to know a secret? I want nothing to do with his sorry
ass. He’s a pathetic piece of shit and I will prove to
everyone that I am better than what he had to give me. I
have that much faith in myself that I deserve SO much more
than that asshole could EVER give me in a lifetime. I’m
not
sure if I love him. I’m not sure if it’s love anymore. I
do
know it’s nothing that it once was. I feel sorry for him.
No, not even that, I just…I don’t know. I think he’s one
of
the most idiotic people I have ever met. There are times
when I wish I would have never met him because I now know
what it’s like to be in love and that high makes all the
lows so much worse. But I also and beyond happy that I met
him. I’ve proven to myself how strong I am. I’ve made it
through some of the worst pains I’ve ever felt. I’ve made
it through and you know what? I’m okay. He doesn’t deserve
me. Did you hear that? I actually believe with all my
heart
that he’s not good enough for me. It makes me sick that
I’ve let him get to me. He lives for hurting people. For
tearing them down to make his pathetic self worth
something. You know what? It only proves how shitty of a
person he is and how good of a person I can be. I don’t
want him back. I’d never, ever take him back now. I
despise
everything he is, everything he stands for. He stands for
hate. All he has is hatred. He only allows himself to feel
hate. Grow up Sean. Wake up. You have to work to get
places. For once in your life, you’ll have to work to be
okay. Life doesn’t come easy. Things in life may come
easy,
but life doesn’t. You may be perfect at baseball, guitar
and anything else, but you are not perfect as a person.
You
are far from it. No one is perfect and everyone has to
work
to get somewhere. You’re a person. You don’t act like you
are, but you are. You are JUST like the rest of us. And do
you know what that means Sean? That means not everything
is
about Sean Allan Miller and his world. Your family loves
you so much and it makes me sick that you are that
ignorant
to not see that. They’d do anything for you. Anything.
Think about how other people may feel for once in your
life. You treat Marc like shit. You don’t stand up for him
at all. How can you call yourself his friend when all you
ever do is tear him down and all you’ll ever do is tear
him
down? You ignore me for months. You treat me like shit
Sean. I put up with so much shit from you that I shouldn’t
have. The first time you lost your temper with me, I
should
have left. Do you remember that Sean? Remember what you
said to me? You hurt me so bad when you said that. You
told
me I should have hated you, I shouldn’t have, but I should
have left you. That was the beginning or a long road of
pain you fed me…and I ate it. I ate every last crumb. I’m
done. Think of this as me throwing everything you fed me,
into your motherfucking face. Taste the pain you gave me
Sean. Absorb it. Don’t ever, ever forget it. Because I
know
I won’t. I can’t run from it and you can’t anymore either.
I won’t let you leave me with all the pain. It’s time for
your share. Buck up. I’m not going easy on you this time.
It’s time for your reality check Sean. And I’m so here to
give it to you.


OMG I am so proud of her, you have NO idea, this is the
strongest i have ever seen her, she wants her life back
and you know what? I know she is going to get it. Sean is
the biggest ass whole ever, and he put her in to much pain
for to long, he gives guys a bad name, and probobly gave
Becca a horrible out look on guys. Becca i love you, and i
hope that you keep to that, he doesnt deserve to keep
tourturing you like that.... he didnt in the first place.
Im so proud of you and i love you.

Well ok now i am really going to sleep. lol. Love you all
night.




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