Ad 0:
Want some cocktail tips? Try some drinks recipes over here
2004-05-03 01:28:56 (UTC)

My Paradise

OK i had to write a short story for english, so i chose to
write a love story.. WHY i did that i have NO idea why i
chose that because i know NOTHING about the topic.. but the
following is my story, give me some feed back so i figure
out what i need to do to make it better. i know there is
one paragraph in it that just doesn't fit, but i dont know
how to fix it... lemme know what you think!

My Paradise

As I sit on the waters edge, feeling the faint
ocean breeze sweep across my face, I dig my toes deep into
the soft sand. This place is so beautiful it’s
indescribable. It holds so many of my memories, and the
beauty of the island could not take away the pain I felt
from the previous time I visited.
Two years ago, this very day, I had married Marc,
a little bit down the beach. I was wearing a simple white
dress that fluttered in the wind and my brown hair went
crazy in the ocean breeze. Marc was wearing a nice white
shirt with khaki pants, looking so handsome. The priest
announced us husband and wife and I smiled with joy. We
were so young and so deep in love. We spent a week on the
island, lying on the beach all day, wrapped up in each
other’s arms. Listening to the waves crash against the
rocks we planned our future, a house in sunny Florida,
where we and our future kids, two boys (Brendan and Merick)
and a girl (Haley) would live. Marc and I even spent the
time planning their futures, joking around about how we
hoped they would find someone to love as much as we loved
each other. We thought we had all the details of our happy
life figured out, or so we thought.
But that was a long time ago, everything is
different now. Even our love for each other was severed.
Our passion for each other turned into jealousy. When one
of us would talk to other people outside of our
relationship, rage boiled inside of us. Both of us
suffered from heartaches, and jealousy can drive a wedge
into the strongest bonds, break up the deepest love.
Returning to this beach known for the gorgeous beach
marriages, but for the also popular divorce.
Staring off above the oceans horizon, the sun
begins to set. I let out a sigh that is filled with agony
and regret. I need to move on, but I am not sure if it is
possible to live a new life with new aspirations. It’s a
shame that this beautiful place, with crystal clear water,
and golden sand, held such agony.
From a distance a man was seen coming down the
beach, he was lured to me because of my loneliness and
passion. He knew I was different from all the other women
he had met in his life. He watched me for a great while,
and I could feel his presence behind me, even before I had
turned around. I felt a strange calming sensation, even
though I was been watched. I turned around to face him and
a spark of connection ran through my body, this was
something I had only experienced in my life once before.
We sat there for a while, just staring at each other, I
felt like I was reunited with an old friend, not just a
random beach go-er. The man invited me to meet him at the
local bar later on that night.
I went back to my hotel room, and got ready for the
night to come. I spent about an hour getting ready,
nervous like a schoolgirl getting ready for her first
date. I met the man at the popular bar on the island, and
we sipped on some cocktails. We chatted about simple
things, the island social life, our hotels, the weather,
food, and the friendly island natives. People passing by
might have noticed the slight flirtation of our
conversation as we concentrated on each other, and spoke
directly into each other’s eyes. But our conversation was
strangely hesitant, considering the natural way we met
early that day on the beach. Once the alcohol set it, the
topic of our chat began to get to deeper subjects, which
evoked strong emotions. I began to feel comfortable with
him; we shared with each other what events brought us to
the island. Against my best judgment, I opened up and told
him about what brought me to the island two years ago and
how I married the only man I ever learned to love and
trust. I explained that before I met my husband, that I
could not trust a single person. I even had found it hard
to trust my own family. But my husband changed my outlook
on life and on people. I also told him things I had kept
buried inside of me for a long time, and was unable to talk
to anyone about. I told him about my first love, and the
feelings I felt after I lost the part of me that connected
my husband and I. Marc went out of town for a week when I
was eight months pregnant. I had fallen very ill and was
taken to the hospital. The doctor said that those kinds of
things happen, and that we could always try again. When he
came back into town, I couldn’t even look him in the eyes.
I had so much hate for him in my heart at that time, for
not being there for me, and part of it was because my baby
girl was taken out of my arms after only being able to hold
her for an hour. The next few months, I withdrew myself
from my husband, friends, and family. I refused to move on
in life and recover, I felt like I would have betrayed my
baby girl. The day of her funeral, I refused to stand by
anyone, and the next day, I left my husband, which I
thought would leave behind my pain.
I looked up to the man sitting in the bar stool
next to me. I could see the pain in his eyes from the
story I was telling him. Looking into his eyes, for the
first time in months, I didn’t feel alone in this world. I
felt the burden slightly being lifted off my shoulders, it
wasn’t much, but it felt great. I began to ponder if I
could have a future with this man, with his wet dark brown
eyes, stinging with tears.
I came back to this island to dissolve my marriage,
but I began to wonder that there might be hope for it. I
stood up from the bar, grabbed Marc’s hand, and took him
back to the beach where we had made our vows to each other
two years ago. Tomorrow morning I would cancel the
divorce, and tonight Marc and I would work on renewing our
promises to each other.