Jin

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2004-04-28 13:27:32 (UTC)

The Last Supper

April 7th - Today I was to go to a somewhat reunion
of "friends" at Frankie & Bennies at Bexleyheath. I arrived
there at around 7. Gemma and this girl I knew Jacky was
there. They were drinking stuff from the bar. Shortly after
Rupesh, Kin, Amy, Ryan, Jamie and Becky came. We all were
chatting and catching up with some gossip and stuff. When
Richard and Vicky came we were then seated. Soon after the
rest of the people came, including Sam, Emily, Michael and
Kayan. We all sat down and we were chatting about what not
and ordered a few drinks. Everyone seemed to be conversing
with eachother and again there seemed to be clearly 2-3
different groups. I had no idea but I felt really weird.
Half the people I couldn't stand and here we were sat
together, eating. From then on I felt that I had been in a
time warp, there in front of me sat the people I left
behind from Bexley Grammar, the people I didn't mind
leaving or not seeing ever again. It was like I became the
me from that era and I just began pissing people off
because I thought that was how I could reconnect with them.
It wasn't the real me, I just found myself chatting about
stuff and annoying people I really like. I didn't even want
to go. Amy, Sam and strangely Michael all wanted me there
even if I didn't want to. I just felt that I had lost a
part of myself and felt that no one had changed from back
then. I also felt that as no else had changed, you wasn't
allowed to change either. The meal was horrible,
disgustingly small portions for the price we paid and it
wasn't even nice. I felt that night had been a waste and it
wasn't like I had been proven wrong. I wasn't surprised
about the night, usually I'm usually optimistic but today I
just felt out of place.
I'm glad I wasn't the only one who felt that way.


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