Amnesia

Smoke a huka over a deep convo

Played dnd two nights in a row. The guys some of them
atleast always walk me home. It's cool when they all do it.
We have much fun.

Anyway though, the next day I went out with Tim and Chris.
We wanted Steph to come to, but steph me and Pepsi decided
to hang tuesday for ladies night. So this will be 4 nights
out in a row for me, and with very out there hours for
most, plus my full/part time slave labor job.

Point though. Pool was fun. Steph brought up this place she
tried with her friend Loren the night TDC went out. It's
called Sigaro and you smoke Huka's there. The way she
described it, and the way it sounds it came to be just a
very nice environment that I wanted to try. Besides I'm of
smoking age and this has only .05% nicotine in it.

We discussed it over the huka after pool. Pep had to be
home so it was the first time it was just me and her. This
was nice. We talked about the experiance, and love lives
mainly. I really wanted to get some stuff off of my chest
and thank god she was there cause I can only hold this for
ever so long before I explode. I don't want to be like
Chris suppressing it all.

I confessed things I've never told anyone. For example.
Thinking that we (she thought about this too) might end up
in a relationship with one of the guys we know now. This is
real weird. I thought about such a concept with most every
guy. Come to think of it I'm kinda in a feeling like that
with another one that I hardly ever associate with. He
graduated before us and he's one of the dnd guys. This is
kinda funny cause it's the only place I can really pick up
guys right now.

It's not like I like him. It's just that he's an
interesting person with an interesting personality, and I
wanna get to know him more. Coming in with the fact that
I'm kinda freakin lonely lately and kinda with to have
friend with priviledges just kinda puts a spin on the
interest of this character.

And I mean he is really freaking interesting. Very
complimentary. I guess the stuff that makes me kinda think
that perchance it could end up beyond friends is that.
Along with he always calling me dear when he talks to me.
Por Example: "So what do you want to do in celestia dear."

This is less of a like because I can't picture him in such
a position. It's difficult to even try. I do just want to
get to know him. Since I'm single and have a hard time
making new friends, I'm thinking perhaps pursuing it
further if the little things click.

It's weird. I've felt similar about half the guys in our
group. If I haven'f felt a similar way, then I was just
turned off by them then. (Damn Eric he made me start
thinking about this kinda stuff, asking me about my love
life and all.) Here's a list: since I love them so much

Erictoo gamer
Christoo high maintenance/suppresive
Timtoo boring/shy

turned off by: Oscar, who I know likes me, but me disgusted
by him, and mike. I don't like any of the mike's I know
actually. I'm shallow can't help it. High standards, no
wonder I'm lonely. I really want a friend with priviledges.