aNd sO i WrItE
2004-03-14 02:36:06 (UTC)

I want to scream

Dear, who eva.... whaddup kidd? nothing over here just
got in tha house of walkin around all day i felt like i
was back up north in New York again walking everywhere and
takin busses and trains .... oh well... i love shitlike
that i like it tight with madd heads... n all its
diversity... i dont know... anyway but yeah so i was down
in tha city... i took out m,ah braids tha night b4 so mah
hair was like PPOOF!! like damn i dunno yo it looked i
stuck a fork in a scockit n i made this face like i was
being i had every one rollin it was
madd funny anyway today as u knwo went down to tha city w
Jay n Christine and Crystle it was str8 i bought mah
brother a new chain he said he wanted one like mine so i
got him one... its hott... but nah down town i dunno down
here its uglu ppl n its pretty ppl but they would i dunno
oh well ... anyway on the way there this sone came on lol
n well... it was like tha perfect words to like tell your
man if you real and of course HA its me.... kathleen elena
paulino of course im tha realest nah mean? sike nah
but i told mah man to d/l n he said it made him happy and
that i made him happy that means alot... bc thas all i
want for him to be happy but i got quiet in tha car n they
was askin me whats wrong whats wrong i said nothing i just
wanted to hear tha song... and all i could think aobut
was.. him.. mah man... mah babycakes... sometimes i hate
it when he dont call me but i hate it more when he thinks
that im not serious with him n that i dont care... if
anything imma be tha only one n last one caring about him
for himof him n in anyway i can care... i hope he's not
reading this but his nosey ass problly is...anyway but i
do love him alot i love him like... nvm im not gone say
it... bc i dont want anyone to think im lame... anyway but
yeah down town i was about to buy this knife... its a
butterfly knife that shit was soo hott i was gone get it
but imma aobu tto go baq n get it bc i lost mines and i
alwasy roll with mah knife nah mean... oh well anyway im
tired right now... n i want to go out i think imma ask
some one to take me out i dunno tho... anyway i got this
email today... and it made me think damn wtf ppl lie
for?...or avoid shit that gone come in tha future... and
then i was thinking about some other shit on mah way home
from the train.. i was like wtf i dont have any fucking
friends n it hurt so bad i wanted to cry but i dont cry in
public... no no no but wtf i hate nothing having anyone to
truwst or talk to ... and then i thougtn more about...
damn wtf i wish Ty was righ there i was at this park and i
just sat down n started gazing off and couple after couple
arm n arm hand in hand n shit like that was walkin by wtf
n i knwo that if he was here i would do that we would be
doing that having a good time wtf yo .....i dunno im
tired i guess i just neeed to go to sleep or suttin i
need to fuckin rest mah head i have alot on it.. and wtf i
dunno *sighs* i dunno how mah day was... iight i guess
but what i been thinking about what i been feeling the way
i been feeling just everything just makes me want to
scream!!!!!!! wtf yo! damn...... i
gtg tho
take care
God Bless