forever 17

silent wishes
Ad 2:
2004-03-13 03:22:15 (UTC)

::sings with the radio, looking like an idiot::

ah yea, but its fun. really good song to. i used some of
it as part of my project today for lit, and told her it
symbolized the people like me, who let people push them
around and dont say anything. like me, because i hate to
have people mad at me, so i let them do what they want
pretty much. but yes, my radio's on really loud and i was
singing along to Self Esteem by Offspring. that has to be
an interesting thing to watch.

we have a book due wednesday for lit, and i'm on chapter
8 or 9 out of 42 and 'Chapter the Last'. guess i know what
i'm doin' this weekend, tho i'd much rather go somewhere,

yes. wow. you know, i almost thought i didnt like it here
by myself in the middle of the night. but now my dad's
home...::sighs:: i think i like the lonliness, quiet, and
fear that somebody's gonna get me better than having him
here. i guess momma and my nephew went to grandma's
tonight, cause they arent home yet, and she had to work til
9. i dunno. i just dont like it here. i know that sounds
self-ish or ungrateful, but its true. i just wanna get away
from here.

my room is digusting...i think i might vaccume this
weekend, cause, even tho i like it kinda messy, this is
getting rather digusting. the white carpet is anything but
now. honestly, you can pick any random spot of carpet and
there'll be atleast 3 different colored stains on it,
anything from bright pink and blue to coke and chocolate.
yea...that's gross i think.

so we leave for gatlinburg next thursday, we being the
band. well, most of it anyway. this is going to be the most
boring, god-awful trip ever. for many mroe reason that i
can tell you.

man...i wish somebody'd get on so i could talk to them. i
think my little voice(s) are getting tired of arguing with
me. and Huck Finn isnt much for entertainment.

i need to talk to my boyfiend. i really need to talk to
him. wonder how come it is that the one time you actually
NEED to talk to somebody, they arent anywhere to be found.
it probably wouldnt be so hard, but i hate calling people's
houses 'cause i'm afraid i'll interrupt something, and like
i said, i hate to have people mad at me. so therefore i
guess i shall sit and wait. ::sits and looks around:: well
now that's going to make for an 'interesting' time...

looking now i realize that i have the strangest
assortment of stuffed animals on my bed. i have a dog, a
monkey and a hedgehog/rat. i lvoe my stuffed animals...

anyway, so there's that. oh! i remember my whole reason
for writting this to begin with. there's a quote that i
found that i really like.

"If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps
it is because he hears a different drummer. Let him step to
the music he hears, however measured or far away."

its by a guy names Thoreau, i found it during lit class one
day when i was trying not to fidget out of sheer boredom
and aggrivation. it amazes me how i ever get out of that
class everyday. she's so god-awful boring...and she's one
of those people who can't stand it if you have an opinion,
especially if it's defferent from hers. it bothers me
because i cant respond to her questions, because no matter
what i say its going to be the wrong thing and i can only
sit perfectly still and silent for so long, and then i
start to fidget. she apparently thinks that after eating a
chocolate chocolate-chip muffin and 1/2 a bottle of diet
dr. pepper that i should be abe to sit still and observe
quiestly. nu-uh. sorry lady, ain't happenin'. and boredom
mixed with sugar and caffeine is no way to get me sedated.
wow...i'm sorry. i had no intention of writting any of that
save for the quote thing. that's all i ever intended to put
in here tonight, and i ended up with this big, long thing.
so yes, hope it wasnt too boring...yea.

oh, and dont ever go to a large store, find one of the
big spot lights out in front of the building, climb up in
front of it and pretend to fly. especially when there's a
police car comming your way. and if you do happen to do
this, run. those people dont have much of a sense of humor.

forever 17.