Never once spoken
i re-read the entry from last night. and while i will not
delete it because of the confusion it may have caused... i
will simply clarify. when i say 'yup, i still love
chris'.... that does not mean i am still IN love with him.
i am not, nor have i been for a long while. i still love
him though. there is a big difference. i love my
friends... but am not IN love with them. comprende? that
hopefully makes more sense.
everything else discussed, however, is true as it was
written. there is nothing to clarify about anything else.
i think it is pretty cut and dry.
tonight. i feel no better. although, i did not wander
around alone. i came home. which i feel is better. i did
not talk to chris tonight. it just isnt time. perhaps
tomorrow, or another night. regardless.... i am alive. i
do need help. i need people to try and understand. and
bear with me. and i need to feel loved. that is true. i
really do. and to an extent... i kind of do. but i need
all of these things amplified, until i can figure out what
is wrong with me. and try to improve my despairity and
feelings of worhlessness. as for now.... i will sleep.