gurlybaby25

lyssa's Diary!
2004-03-05 05:56:32 (UTC)

life is great!

for a while life was really goin down hill, school sucked,
my friends were getten into things that they shouldnt have
been, aj and i werent talken, i was haven a hard time
letting go for real this time and him being so mean, my car
broke down i owed my parents money, my job was stressing me
to know end.. just ahh!!!
well now, life is good... actually it has gotten alot
better, and yes it was sort of the help of aj from one
night, aj and i talked for 3 hrs, and we discussed
everything, he talked about god, and past stuff, and how to
get through them. that was the last time we really talked
which was about 2 oe 3 weeks ago. i quit my job, it was
just causing so much stress on me, that i was starting to
get sick... i'll explain that later too...
as soon as i stopped talken to aj, i realized i needed to
open myself up, especially to guys i never gave them a
chance. i am now talken to this guy named taylor, and hes
20. yes he may be a little old, but hey! aj is gonna be 20
in july! so no difference really. but im also talken to
this guy brett i go to school with him, but i dont know him
all to well.. im getting to know them both and in reality
im so glad that im dating and keeping my options open. i
forgot what i was like to flirt again, and to be all giddy,
and have butterflys. so i guess im getten back to my old
self. it feels great, and this time i really dont have ne
desire to talk to aj. im more interested in if that guy is
gonna call me, and what there up too.. yes my mind may
wander a little and wonder what aj is doin and wat he is up
to, but that was the past and i have realized aj is not in
my future, i dont want him in my future, he caused me way
to much pain.. i have finally realized that when i talk to
tehes guys and say back what aj used to say to me... cuz i
would never let ne of my friends take that crap from a guy
why should i?.. ne ways im happy and liven life, im gonna
continue to go to school, and finish my senior year out
next year, and excperience everything that a teenager
should. have the things that i wanted to do a few
weeks/months ago was for aj, now its for me.. im my own
person.. i dont need aj... :)




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