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2004-02-29 19:24:30 (UTC)

feelings vs. promises

for all of u who are actually interested in what i have to
say... welcome to my little blurb spot again. i decided
to restart this little online diary again after spending
the day w/ my girl mands yesterday... and we figured that
even if noone else reads these little things... it may
still be "theraputical" lol (although she informed me
that wasn't actually a word) as well as amusing to one
another.... so here goes.

so i've been doing a great deal of thinking lately about a
great many things. one thing that has been pestering me a
bit from day to day is the idea of expecting a certain
amount of things from people around you. we have all had
those times when we feel very "moved" to admit to
something, or to believe that things should be a certain
way, or that we want to change something about ourselves,
or even the way we feel about another person in
particular. Unfortunately, we as humans.... who are
constantly changing creatures because we r stuck in this
world broken into time, have a tendency to take back
feelings. however, we should realize that feelings aren't
even necessarily "taken back".... for once they have been
disclosed they are out in the open... they can, however,
dissipate... like the wet ground drys after the rain, or a
fresh popsicle melts in the sun. feelings may not be an
everlasting event, like the ground is, or even the
popsicle stick, and many times this convinces us that
whatever it is that we "felt" at the moment is no longer
there, therefore we have no ties to our great epiphanies.

Now this idea may upset many people... and i must admit
upsets myself at times... how fair is it that a person may
say something that they can "take back" later, what does
anything anyone ever says worth at all then??? who can u
believe, or trust or depend on in any way at all?? so
where does that bring us??

lately, i have stumbled upon a new theory, although it may
be slightly ideal, it is still rather strong and possibly
even convincing lol. and this idea surrounds the subject
of feelings vs. promises. You see, feelings can rarely be
depended upon or exploited, for although momentarily
convincing and delightful, feelings can be altogether
often deceiving and resentful. However, a promise is in
another category. not that a promise can be fully relied
on, as few things are... but w/ a promise comes a great
deal of consideration and committment, and with which,
more can be expected than with fleeting emotional
stances. However, with promises comes another factor,
having to do w/ the character of one who promises... for
all too often a character that is based on personal
gratitude and not on humane integrity will fail to make
promises that are truly palpable.

now, why in the world would i be thinking about these
things in such great detail at such a moment in time??
well, who knows, i suppose that is my business... but it
is true that at times we all need to look at the
situations around us, and understand what it is that hurts
us that we can blame on others as opposed to realizing
that blame placing is worthless, and the only real option
is to move on and learn from ur situations.... as u may
be able to tell, i have opted to take hold of the second,
for i have come to realize that whatever i go through, it
is much more helpful to learn something than to sulk....
and this girl is to solid to sulk more than needed :)

so to all reading, have a wonderful day, and more will
much love,

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