purple star

smack

well. today i had 12 hours of school. fun times! haha
not. tuesday is my leap day. unlike many other's leap day
which is wednesday (you know half way through the week).
cuz at the end of tuesday, it may as well be the end of
wednesday cuz i just work a double tomorrow.... which is
not nearly as stressful as school. ok heather... stop it.
just get to the point of the entry....

so i went out with ash tonight (after having somewhat of a
rough week emotionally with her because of ferry). i met
her in castlebay when i got home from school and then we
randomly went to maryland inn. (garrett told us bill was
working). so we walk in and josh is there. with his
girlfriend. uncomfortable.??? i said nothing to him and
ashley and i went and sat far away. so ten minutes later
we get up to go to the bathroom and they are gone.

i guess he felt uncomfortable too. which is
understandable. the girl you sleep with on a regular basis
comes in when your girlfriend (who lives in louisiana) just
happens to be there. but i realized something. i thought
that i was just hooking up with him cuz he was there and i
like him as a person. i felt very strange tonight. like i
have feelings for him. so i think im going to stop
everything with him. tell him why, so as not to think that
i got pissed off or something. and then just stop. i need
to stop fucking around anyway. i've been doing it enough
lately. im just so confused on so many levels when it
comes to pretty much every guy in my life. ugh.
anyway.... im heading to bed. it was all i could do to
stay awake in school today. and i have to work a double
tomorrow. so goodnight moon.