Jules420

The Adventures of Jules Santana
2004-02-24 19:47:18 (UTC)

Property and Possessions

Alright, now I know that I write and bitch about simplistic
things and things that shouldn’t really be bothering me,
but this one is one that just has become a frustration in
my life. I honestly think that Orlando is jealous of my
relationship with Wanda. I mean it appears as if he is
either jealous or he feels the need to possess me, and let
me just say for the record that he and I have gone over
this quite a few times b/c this is nothing new. I mean
when we were together in college, everyone used to joke and
say things like “oooh Orlando let you out?” or “Is Orlando
keeping you locked up in a room?” b/c Orlando would be so
possessive of my attention. Well it seems like I find
myself going through this same sort of thing now, and I
honestly think it’s because of Wanda. I mean I am a little
upset with it, yet flattered at the same time. I mean why
else would he constantly call me at least 8-10 times within
an hour whenever I am hanging out solely with her. I mean
I think that is a bit rude in my opinion. But I don’t
know. Is he jealous because he wants all my attention and I
am trying to divide it amongst all of my friends? I mean
do Wanda and me really have a twisted or disturbing or
uncomfortable relationship? I mean we just understand each
other and can go through all the bullshit and everything is
fine within 10 minutes. I mean Dre gets upset with it too,
and I think its just weird. I mean honestly, we’ve known
each other for our entire lives, or at least our entire
developmental stages that turned us into the people we are
today. Talking to her is like talking to another Julian or
something. I mean the thing that just really gets to me is
the fact that I hang with him, do things for him, spend
time with him, far more than with Beth, and we’ve known
each other for literally 20 years. The problem I see that
is going on is that I am Orlando’s only outlet as far as
friends go, and I understand that. The problem is I can’t
be only his friend. He’s also fucked up a lot of the
relationships he’s had with my friends based on his own
actions, so not everyone wants to hang out with him all the
time. We shall see. It’s just funny to watch this fall
out and then have him start to act a certain way with me. I
mean honestly, I don’t know what to do. I feel like I
should just not care anymore because all I do is go around
and around with the bullshit and then it appears to be ok,
and then what happens, shit gets fucked. I don’t know what
I’m going to do, but it is getting annoying.




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