Crazy in Blue

Singing In the Rain or A downpouring
2004-02-16 06:50:39 (UTC)

My Immortal

IT'S BEEN 2 WEEKS, AND NOT A WORD FROM HIM. NOW, I KNOW
THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TIME THAT I AM ABLE TO GIVE HIM
UP, AND MOVE ON IN MY LIFE, BUT CAN I AT LEAST GET A
BITCH, IM ALIVE KIND OF LETTER, YA KNOW. I DON'T WANT
MUCH, JUST TO KNOW THAT HE IS DOING OKAY. OF COURSE, YOU
KNOW WHO I AM TALKING ABOUT, ROMMEL. I THINK THAT FOR THE
LAST 2 WEEKS, I HAVE BEEN MISSING HIM SOMETHING CRAZY.
AND I JUST REALIZED THAT I AM GOING TO HAVE TO FIGURE OUT
WHAT I AM GOING TO DO WITH MYSELF, TO GET MY MIND OFF OF
HIM, AND ON WHAT IT NEEDS TO BE. NAMELY, SCHOOL, WORK, MY
MOMM, AND THE REST OF THE WORLD. I TALKED TO HIS SISTER
TODAY, NOT REALLY TALKED, JUST ASKED IF SHE HAD HEARD FROM
HIM. I FELT STALKERISH ABOUT IT, BUT I STILL HAD TO
KNOW. OF COURSE, SHE HADN'T HEARD FROM HIM EITHER, SO I
FELT A LIL BIT BETTER. I DON'T THINK SHE THOUGHT THAT I
WAS BEING A STALKER, I DIDN'T ASK ALL KINDS OF DUMB ASS
QUESTIONS, SO I GUESS I AM GETTING A LIL BIT BETTER. OF
COURSE, NOW SHE HAS MY SCREEN NAME, AND SHE CAN LIKE LOOK
AT MY AWAY MESSAGES, AND I KNOW I AM GOING TO FORGET THAT
SHE CAN, AND HAVE SHIT UP THERE WITH HIS NAME IN IT. BUT
YOU KNOW WHAT, IT'S GOING TO BE OKAY.

SO THE OTHER BIG THING IN MY LIFE, DERRICK, IS FINALLY
OVER. TODAY, I WAS JUST TALKING TO THIS GIRL FROM WORK,
WHO GOES TO THE CHURCH, AND I WAS TALKING ABOUT THE GUY
THAT IS A HORRIBLE PERSON, BUT I STILL HAVE "FEELINGS":
FOR. ALL I SAID WAS HIS FIRST NAME, AND SHE IMMEDIATELY
KNEW WHO I WAS TALKING ABOUT. WHY WAS HE HOLLERING AT HER
LIKE 2 MONTHS BEFORE ME. AND I FOUND OUT THAT ZINA MIGHT
NOT HAVE HAD ANTHING TO DO WITH IT, IT WAS PROLLY BECAUSE
HE DIDN'T GET TO FUCK. WHICH IS FUCKED UP FOR HIM, CUZ IF
HE HAD ANSWERED MY CALLS, HE WOULD HAVE GOT IT. BUT NOW I
FEEL A LI BIT BETTER BAOUT MY DECISION, BECUZ I JUST FOUND
OUT HE GOT BABIES ALL OVER THE DAMN STATE. THE NEWEST ONE
IS LIKE 6 MONTHS OLD. HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT. GOTTA LOVE
GOD, HE SURE IS FUNNY. SO AT LEAST I CAN FEEL A LIL BIT
BETTER ABOUT MYSELF. NOW IF I JUST KNEW WHAT THE FUCK WAS
GOING ON WITH COOPER. OF COURSE, I DON'T REALLY CARE, BUT
I STILL WANT TO KNOW. YOU KNOW THOUGH, I THINK ME AND
PEARL ARE GOING TO FIND OUR BOOS, AND GET TO STOP MESSING
WITH THESE CLOWNS. (OF COURSE ANY BOO WOULD BE A BACK UP
PLAN, BECUZ WE ALL KNOW I AM GOING TO MARRY ROMMEL)

BUT YEAH, IM GOING TO BED NOW, HOLLA AT ME!