blueswede

St. Valentine's Day Massacre

As is tradition for single people with journals, I'm writing
an update on or around Valentine's Day. So here's what has
gone down since last time.

My roommate moved out, so I have the place to myself now. I
am enjoying that immensely, though it is taking some getting
used to. Having structured my life to avoid coming back to
my room, I sometimes forget I can. But I'm enjoying having
some privacy and autonomy for once.

Things remain unchanged between me and the grad student. I
quasi-asked her out again the other day; basically I said I
had a fair amount of free time coming up during the next few
weeks, and asked whether she was game to maybe catch a movie
or something at some point. She had a lot to do, of course,
and would have to see how things progressed with her courses
and workload and all that jazz.

So I don't know where things stand right now. Most of what
she's said and done since I've known her seems to suggest at
least some level of interest. She gave me her phone number
without my actually asking for it, she was open to going to
the stand-up comedy show, and when I've called her, she has
always said she's glad to hear from me. But then of course
she's always been busy, and I've been around long enough to
know that the words "I'm busy" are usually code for "I'm not
interested but I won't be up-front about it."

The thing is, I've never gotten any sort of generalized "I'm
busy" from her. It's always been specific. The comedy show
for instance; it took her several days from the time I asked
her to determine whether she'd be free. Now either that one
was authentic or she went to a hell of a lot of trouble just
to make it seem authentic. Likewise with my latest general
approach; she could have said "I seriously don't think I'll
have the time," and that would have been it. Instead, I get
"I'll have to see what happens with all this." Referring to
her workload, that is.

I dunno, maybe this frustration is what I get for trying to
date a med student. I like to think of myself as generally
pretty patient, but I'm starting to be bothered by all these
roadblocks. I'd just like to know where we stand so that I
can act accordingly. If she is interested, that's great, I
can stop fretting and just bide my time until she's free for
once. If she's not, then I'd like to know so I can move on
with my life and stop a fruitless pursuit.

At the same time I can't say there's really anyone else I'm
interested in right now. But maybe that's because I've been
focused on pursuing a relationship with this gal. I really
couldn't say for sure. What I do know is that I really like
her. She's sweet and pretty and she's been really friendly
to me. The situation certainly is not the sort of thing I'm
used to, but I do think it's a positive one.

You have to love how things pan out: I finally meet someone,
and now her schedule gets in the way. You'd think somewhere
along the line I could get a break.

And before I close, let me just say that Valentine's Day had
to have been invented by greeting card companies, florists,
and chocolatiers. Who else would profit from rubbing single
people's noses in it for a whole day? Thanks guys, I almost
forgot what other people have and I lack. Fucking holidays.

This is Dave, signing off.