Kid A

Poetry, Thoughts and Abstract Lies
2004-02-13 16:46:54 (UTC)

now my world has gone i'm just one

"Ninety Pockets of Death"

my feelings gone without warning
body tries hard to cope
i can't see myself mourning
all that lives here is hope
sudden loss becomes sterile
ninety pockets of death
my eyes have gone in denial
my crying makes me turn left


that was ok but i suppose it could be better. i wasn't
really feeling inspired but at night i kind of get this
feeling that words come really easily. in the day i can't
really concentrate but at night my mind becomes really
focussed and i feel more open to ideas.
it has been a busy busy day today - i rang some random
company about a job interview and then i opened an account
at my local Lloyds TSB. i need money because i am broke at
the moment and fed up of being broke. as much as i hate the
things that money brings, i need it for myself and general
costs of living, besides i am being hassled by parents to
get a job - so i am.
for some reason, i can justify getting a really shitty job
because then it will be really easy for me to leave, and i
won't need a good reason because the fact that i hate it
would be good enough. if i get a half decent job for just
temporary, i won't be able to justify leaving (in my mind)
because i won't be able to give myself a good reason - it's
very bizarre. but basically, i could be getting a job this
week and then i will be a member of "the system" and at
least i will have my own money then.
i also visited my local Post Office to get a provisional
driving license (or at least the relevant forms) - i am old
enough to drive, i just haven't felt the need yet to rush
out and start driving. people have asked me why i don't
drive yet, and i don't really have a reason - i just didn't
feel like it.
besides, what's the point? the insurance will be highly
expensive, along with a car and the actual test, and then i
have to pay insurance. i don't have any money so how can i
afford this? i will just save towards a car, or get my
license now and drive the "family car" until i am 21, then
i will get my own car. i will get paid more when i am 21
(because i imagine i will have a different "job") and then
i'd imagine that the insurance will be cheaper then.
if i get this job i estimate that i will be making around
£130 a month, which is about £130 a month more than i make
at the moment, so it should be very good.
that's all for now, i will write more later.
Kid A.




Ad: