God! I like Billy SO much!! And I know I can have him. And
I know it'd be great. But I can't! He's done tons of things
that I haven't done and I'm afraid he'll expect things. Ya
know? I've already started doing the same damn shit I
1. I like a guy.
2. The guy knows.
3. I can't talk to the guy.
4. I start to act like a bitch to the guy.
There's something seriously wrong with me. I couldn't talk
to Billy in the first place. He makes me nervous. The
song "Why Don't You & I" by Santana fits perfectly
here..."every time I try yo talk to you I get tongue, every
thing I say to you comes out wrong never comes out right"
And you know, Billy shouldn't make me nervous!! He
shouldn't make my stomach do flip-flops every single time
he sits by me. And besides, I think he's insane anyway. I
mean, what guy in their right mind would like ME?!?! Only a
psycho. A complete psycho. And I know he likes me and I
wish he didn't. But if I didn't know, I'd wish I did.
Confusing, I know.
Okay so I'm gonna go try to go back to sleep. Too early on