Broken hearted Lesbian

my life, my hell
2004-01-22 04:59:40 (UTC)

start a sorta fairytale with you

*runs hair through fingers*
i was just informed that jess, instead of joining the
reserves, is now in active duty. she leaves feb.17 for
boot camp and then is shipped off right away and will be
gone for a year. marcie and lace are a wreck. i wish there
was something i could do to help heal their pain. jess
didnt even talk to marcie b4 she signed the papers. marcie
came over in mass tears. the only thing i could do was
hold her and wipe away the tears. i wanted to kill jess
for doing that to her. and its not because of our past,
marc is my best friend. i hate it when she hurts. its
almost like i can feel it. is that weird?

y is it that ppl only find me desirable when i am in a
relationship?? they could give a fuck when i am single,
but when im taken, watch out.

i get to see liv friday. im very excited. i havent seen
her in forever. i cant wait. i love that grrl. she used to
sing me to sleep every night back when i had problems
sleeping. i firmly believe we would have officially dated
had i not been such an ass and be afraid of relationships.
but now we are so close. i wouldnt trade that for the
world.

its late. i dont have any finals tomorrow which means no
school. however, i have to get up at 615 to call my grrl
then again at seven to go over to jess's apartment so she
can help me with my homework. christ...

~j




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