Ad 2:
2004-01-19 16:59:14 (UTC)

Screw off.

Ok...first off I want to say I’m sorry to those of you who
read this and it doesn’t apply to. you can say I’m a
bitch...I just look at it as being messed up and only
human. I can take a fair amount of crap but any some point
I have to let it out. my diary is here for me to share
things. write about them. express myself.

to the unsigned note’s who I don’t know *cough* Mary Anne
is one *cough* you can say what you want but it don’t
really matter...say I’m a bitch I don’t care. To Mary
Anne. I don’t know where you got this crap about me
leading guys on. You can say what you want...make up shit
but me, Adam and Blundon all know that I said I wouldn’t
get with them when they came in. ok...they know that there
for I cant be leading them on when I said to them I didn’t
want to get with them. As for mark...I don’t know how the
hell I’m leading him on. You say all this shit about it
but I like mark. And you say but you still like ray. Yeah
I do. You wanna know something. I loved ray and that’s not
something you can get over...and if you do it's very hard
to do. I’m moving on. And mark knows all about ray. And
even if he didn't you could say to me I think you should
tell him not automatically assume I’m keeping it from him
and start bitching at me about how guys have feelings too.
I fucking know that ok. I’m not as cold hearted as you may
think. And as for leading ray on...what the fuck is that
about?! me and Ray have a really weird situation. he can't
handle a relationship and I know that. if anything he's
leading me on...actually he did lead me on when he asked
me to be with him and a few hours later, yet again, broke
it off. I’m tired of you saying all this shit to me. you
wanna know why I don’t tell you things? for this
reason...you tend to use it against me! and I’m fucking
tired of it. you've always don’t it to me. why do you feel
the need to turn people against me? grade 6...like what
was that about. you had to make rumors up about me? try
and turn the class on me. does it make you feel good or
something? is that how you get your pleasure? trying to
ruin my life? one of these days I will actually flip at
you...in person...and I don’t know when that day will be.
but I just want you to stay out of my fucking life. I
can’t take you saying this shit about me. and if you
really feel the need to tell people things about me...
tell them truth, ok? no on needs bullshit and your just
making my life about 10 times more difficult trying to
straiten everything out with people. and if you even more
so want to talk about my life when you have nothing better
to do...at least talk about it to me...no need to hide.
people tell me what you say. if your going to say stuff I
wanna hear it...say it to me...ok?

I know this really makes me seem like a bitch now but I
just can’t take that crap anymore. like the front of my
diary says, "come as you want, leave when you want; say
what you want, be what you want. I am me and there is
nothing you can do to change that. You don’t except me,
fine…I don’t care. I may have impacted your life, but you
never made a dent on mine.”

"Walking in this world of eternal darkness,