stitched_soul

DiNaH says...
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2004-01-19 01:46:52 (UTC)

daddy says goodbye

yesterday around noon, after church, my father called me to
come over the master's bedroom. he couldn't walk through
the door anymore. for weeks, he cannot go out of the room
anymore.

he said he's been wanting to talk to me days before. then
tears just started to fall thru my cheeks. i already knew
what he was going to say... well, more likely.

"gusto kong magpaalam sa'yo dahil nararamdaman kong hindi
na ako magtatagal. gusto ko ring humingi ng tawad..."
he was crying... it was breaking my heart.
at last, he asked for forgiveness! at last, even without
saying, he already admitted his sins. he released his guilt
that more likely, has been causing him more pain than his
illness'.

i've waited for so long to hear that from him. at first, to
prove that i was right and i never made up anything. and i
didn't lie.
but then, now that he admitted the truth, we were both
releaved. the revelation wasn't for any clarification
anymore, it was more for him... to rest from his miseries --
physically and emotionally.
hinabilin nya rin sa akin si ina, and i promised him he
shouldn't worry about us 'coz i will take care of her, i
will take care of myself. he shouldn't worry if he wants to
rest, he can... i'm letting him go. if God wants to take my
father back to His hands, i'm surrendering him to the Lord.
He'll be happy there, i know that. he deserves to rest
because he's suffered too much already.
i've forgiven him. maybe the guilt he was keeping inside
was the barrier that hinders him to pass through the
tunnel.

now, any moment, he's free to go on his way.

i'll always treasure the good times i had with him. the
things he has taught me... the good things we shared.

i'll always be my daddy's girl -- that i know.


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