daccn

I am not a clerk
2004-01-16 03:40:17 (UTC)

lethargy/fish

I decided today I'd go downtown and see a movie before it
got too busy at school for me to have afternoons like that.
So, I found myself in a darkened theatre with a sparse and
scattered audience watching "Big Fish".

Every time I go to a movie or a concert, especially if I'm
by myself, the hope is that it will pummell me,
emotionally. Much of the reason I like opera is that it
lends itself so well to that purpose. In a sense, when I go
to the movies I'm hoping for True Love, for something that
will drain me of all emotion and make me reconsider my
purpose in life. It's been years since a movie has actually
done that ("Adaptation" came the closest, I think) and "Big
Fish" turned out not to be my cinematic soulmate. That's
not to say that I didn't like the movie, though - it was
just a surface movie, that's all.

I'm having a little bit of difficulty getting myself back
into academic mode. I'm not being very sociable and hardly
doing any work at all. Sooner or later I will need to get
back into thinking about school again.

Today I was accosted while walking to the train station, by
someone who apparently recognised me from a seminar that
afternoon and wanted to inquire about my textbook and when
and how much I would be using it (he apparently doesn't
want to buy one himself). I probably wasn't very friendly,
although I really had no reason to be unfriendly. Being
interrupted on the way to somewhere by a total stranger who
wants my book is rather an unfamiliar situation for me.

It's odd - I don't mind chatting with random people before
class, or while hanging around the building, or some other
similar loungeur, and can actually be quite friendly in
these situations; but if interrupted while working on
something or while on my way somewhere, I am apt to be curt
and dismissive. This is probably not an attitude very
conducive to meeting people; perhaps it's just my dislike
of random interruptions. I would make a lousy nurse.




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